


I'd break the back of love for you

by mercuryretrograte (brujadelmar)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bakery, Alternate Universe - Tattoo Parlor, Awkward Romance, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Multi, POV Bisexual Character, Smoking, Social Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-19
Updated: 2018-03-19
Packaged: 2019-04-04 11:23:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14019210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brujadelmar/pseuds/mercuryretrograte
Summary: Prompt KD-17: Tattoo artist Yifan is just about to close up shop for the night when the cute baker from across the road stumbles through his front door, drunk as hell.





	I'd break the back of love for you

.

 

 

 

Wu Yifan is a man.

This is quite a solid concept in his life. He has never doubted it. Since he was very young, he didn’t see himself as a boy. He was a m-a-n, and every little evidence pointed to that. He was taller, smarter, tougher and focused than the boys of his age. He was blessed with a natural frown that made everyone think twice before starting some shit. He grew taller than every authority figure, and, consequently, there was no way someone could look down on him. Yifan trained hard every day to be more than just a scary look. He decided to work in his teenage years, so he could be also a provider for his family.

Yifan is also a gentleman.

He makes sure he treats everyone kindly and to show he is respectful towards them. He likes manly things, but not the cheap ones. He enjoys manly fashion, manly refined food and manly sport cars. He doesn’t like to study everything, but he tries to be an educated man in the important subjects – like reading the newspapers and listening to the radio while he’s drawing. He cooks, sometimes. He enjoys listening to music, preferably alone, in his house. He cleans his shop daily – even if he pays someone to clean it in the weekends.

Yifan, of course, is a single man.

It’s not that he doesn’t like to compromise, but Yifan lived in five different countries since he was a kid. His parents moved out a lot, and he went abroad to study drawing when he decided what he wanted to do with his life. Yifan is not exactly a loner, but he got used to be by himself. Independence was really important. And, after all, there was a bunch of beautiful girls waiting for a man who actually knows how to treat them right and Yifan can’t disappoint them.

And… Yifan may be… a bisexual man.

He doesn’t think about that a lot. It’s just… he has two best friends and one of them is straight and the other one is gay. Both look pretty gay, and that makes Yifan looks like he’s very straight. And he’s not. He’s just very manly. Sometimes, a handsome man hits on him and he feels good. He would date one of them, if he wasn’t so popular between girls. He had more girlfriends in his first months in his new tattoo shop than clients. This is not a problem anymore; _The Black Dragon Tattoo Shop_ is now very popular and Yifan is enjoying his single life by sleeping early and working more. In the past few months, he barely even kissed someone, so busy that he had to hire a receptionist because he couldn’t tattoo his clients and at the same time, answer the phone and talk to the visitors. Also, people thinks he’s not… very receptive. The word they like to use is… delicate. And the only delicate thing Yifan can do is to draw – he has a light touch to lines, the actual reason he made his name in the tattooing area.

He doesn’t like delicate, soft… or… cute. Or maybe… just one… small little thing—person. A baker. A baker named Kyungsoo, who happens to work in an also cute bakery across the road, where Yifan buys not-manly-at-all little croissants, flavored breads, muffins and cupcakes, just so he can hear the tiny baker say ‘thank you for your business, welcome back anytime!’ while Yifan just wants to hug him. Badly. Beside his clients being visibly scared of him with the tattoo gun and the mask getting confused with the rainbow-and-clouds cupcake he’s eating, the worst part is having to sit down and watch rap videos until he no longer desires to punch a wall.

Wu Yifan is a confident man.

He grabs the mike in any club and raps freestyle with no fear. He drives around in a Mercedes-Benz, windows down. He hits on the prettiest girl of any party he steps in. He fights any disrespectful guy in the streets. He’s his own bodyguard.

Yet he can’t even say a word without sweating when the baker looks up at him, smiling. His smile forms a heart. His glasses are too big on his button nose. He has tiny, dexterous hands with short nails. When he looks up, his eyes go big and he looks…

Damn, he looks cute as hell. Yifan’s brain stops working and his legs are jelly. He stutters. Wu Yifan. _Stutters_.

And the worst thing is that the baker looks pretty shy too. Once he was obligated by his coworkers to use a Santa hat and he looked like he wanted to die. Another time, the girl who decorates the cupcakes drew little hearts on his tag and he refused to wear it. His voice changes when a customer comes in and he looks down often.

Yifan knows all those things because he is a very observant man. The cool name for stalker.

.

 

The bar is crowded, they’re sitting on tiny seats – Yifan can’t feel half of his ass anymore-, the barman had to part Luhan’s “fight” after a game of “find-the-homosexual-at-this-table”, the two girls at the corner are watching them like it’s a telenovela and Tao drank every pink and sparkly drink in the place; it’s what Yifan calls a party. He’s too tired to actually try to have some fun, because he had to reschedule an appointment, so he has to work at a Saturday night. He has to pretend he’s at least content with his traditional #fridayandfriends – a courtesy of Tao’s Instagram.

“So… you have a crush,” Tao grins, biting the rainbow straw.

“I don’t have a crush,” Yifan retorts, looking around. “It’s not a crush.”

“Sounds like a crush to me,” Luhan says, lifting his beer.  “It’s okay, you can admit.”

“I don’t have a crush,” Yifan sighs. “I just… think he’s interesting.”

“Ah, baby we’re too old for this,” Tao pretends he’s concerned. “I hate to break the news, but you like this guy. Finding someone interesting is like… stalking them on Instagram. Describing a guy’s mouth as “heart-shaped” is too cheesy… even for me. Are you following me?”

Yifan drinks his beer slowly as an answer.

“Let him suffer,” Luhan shrugs. He has two buttons open, and his weird tattoo is showing up. He’s definitely drunk. “Mr _. I never fell in love_ here wants to be the Elza of this group? I don’t mind.”

It’s pretty easy to be the cold one between them. Luhan chased his girlfriend like a crazy man and spent a year’s salary to get her attention. Zitao actually moved out to another city to be near his boyfriend after a week of dating. Yifan is not going to apologize for being a normal person.

“I just don’t understand why you don’t talk to him, if this isn’t a crush,” Tao pretends he’s curious. A few drinks and he becomes Regina George. “I mean, just say, hello, I want to be your friend. Bring him here to drink with us.”

“I can’t just say that,” Yifan shakes his head in disbelief. “He’ll think I’m crazy.”

“It’s a mystery for me how you even have friends,” Luhan comments, frowning. “Have you even been in real life? Or you just… pretend you’re in a fucking rap movie video all the fucking time?”

“Luhan swore two times in a sentence,” Tao runs his index finger in his neck, signalizing to the barman to stop bringing alcohol. “We should eat something. I don’t need a hangover tomorrow, I got shit to do.”

A couple of stumbling drunks stop by their table.

“Are you guys… celebrities or something?” One of them asks. A table full of expensive drinks, Zitao’s glitter shirt-and-eyeliner, Yifan’s signed clothes and Luhan’s face always convince people of their famous state. But they’re not and Yifan isn’t in the mood for pranking today.

“No,” he says, sighing, dismissing them with a hand gesture. “Let’s go, guys. I have a long session tomorrow to finish this guy’s leg. The man wanted to cover his whole leg and cried like a baby in the first session. I will have to babysit him.”

“Just one picture,” Tao asks, already turning the phone for a selfie. Yifan rolls his eyes, but what can he do? He poses with them.

Yifan drives them home. He’s not _that_ drunk and no one stops his Mercedes if he drives carefully. He laughs really hard at Sehun’s and Tao’s banter (“ _You’re not going to sleep in my bed stinking like that”, “Excuse me? Even my vomit smell like channel number five!”)_ and he has to stop Luhan from bombarding Xiaotong with drunk messages.

He has a weird feeling in his chest when he comes home.

.

 

Yifan walks to his work. He had no place to park his baby safely, so he’d rather do some exercise. And, sometimes, walk by the bakery. Which he’s going to do, because it’s Saturday and he deserves some sugar to give him the energy to work on a sacred day. He opens the door and sniffs in the characteristic scent of bread.  He has never been there on weekends and he feels weird to be actually seen. On weekdays, the place is always crowded, full of instagirls taking cute pictures of the decoration and the food. He walks in timidly, and the girl in the counter is alone, just attending a mother with her small kid. He inspects the food and decides to pick some substantial food before looking at the messy colorful ones.

“Hello, I’m Joohyun,” the girl smiles to him. She is strikingly pretty and her pink apron is making her look even nicer. “How can I help you?”

“Huh… can I have pizza bread and baguettes?” Yifan points to the small desserts. “And… what are those things?”

“Macarons,” she informs him. “They’re a French small cake. It’s very tasty.”

“They’re very… small. I want one of every color, then,” he says, actually confused.

“They’re different flavors,” she chuckles. “Not just colors.”

“I don’t mind. I’m not very picky,” he says, looking around. No sight of the baker. Maybe he’s in the kitchen. “Ah… and a piece of the chocolate cake.”

“He’s not working today,” she says, almost whispering.

“Huh?” Yifan stares at her. She has a small smile in her lips.

“Kyungsoo,” she says simply. “He doesn’t work at Saturdays. It’s his free day.”

Yifan blinks.

“What?” He starts to cough suddenly. The girl starts to carefully put the macarons in a decorated pastel green bag, and for a minute, he thinks she will ignore him.

“Hyoyeon noticed you always look for him,” she says quietly. “But don’t worry. You’re not the only one.”

Yifan feels a mix of embarrassment and jealousy. He stops coughing and licks his lips, thinking about some excuse.

“I think he likes you too,” she says, picking up the baguettes. She places then over a paper and rolls them perfectly. “He doesn’t smile often. He’s not… Kyungsoo isn’t very good at faking emotions… If he doesn’t like a client, he won’t smile.”

He just stares at her cutting a big slice of cake in silence. She finishes putting all together in bags and bows.

“I’m really sorry, we’re out of pizza bread,” she says gracefully. “Kyungsoo is the one who bakes it, it’s his recipe. Maybe if you come tomorrow, you can find it?”

Yifan leaves the bakery full of questions. Did this girl just hint that he should talk to Kyungsoo? Are her setting them up? Why Kyungsoo doesn’t smile often?

And honestly, why are these macarons so expensive?

 

None of his questions are answered immediately. The man in the chair is crying again. Yifan is used to it. There’s a reason why he charges 50% of the payment before the tattoo. Many people enter his room, see him sitting down with a mask and just… want to run away. A guy once started complaining about pain while Yifan was _shaving_ his arm.

Yifan opened the store himself. Amber refused to work in the weekend, even with extra pay. He doesn’t think he would need her to answer the phone or talk to clients, but she’s good at entertaining the scared ones. The man asks for Yifan to stop at least five times; in any other time, Yifan would just dismiss him, but he has to finish this tattoo – it’s a personal thing, now.

It only takes ten hours. Yifan charges him twice, because he is also considering his psychological effort used to not slap that man. Many people believe a tattooist is a type of therapist and that’s not a profession Yifan would choose.

When he’s finally alone, he’s too exhausted to go home. Coincidentally, the phone rings.

“Black Dragon Tattoo Shop,” he says like a robot. 

“ _Hey, man,”_ Amber laughs in the other end of the line _. “Why are you still there?”_

“Dude cried like a baby,” Yifan sighs. “How did you know I was here?”

“ _You’re lazy as hell,”_ she almost sings. “ _Have you checked on your crush today?”_

“I don’t have a crush. I don’t know what are you talking about.”

“ _Really? What type of adorable bread are you eating today? Man, just talk to him. You’ll get fat with all those carbs.”_

“I’m eating a pie. Because I’m hungry,” he defends himself, but even in his ears, it sound kind of a weak answer. “I’m also thinking about quitting the tattoo business and start selling macarons.”

“ _That would be a smart thing, those hipsters pay anything in some aesthetic shit,”_ she chuckles, and Yifan realizes she’s in a good mood. “ _Then you can hire that baker and ogle him all day long. Literally combining business with pleasure.”_

Yifan laughs and he feels a bit better.

“I can’t deal with you. Why did you call, you punk?”

“ _Just to check on you, Godzilla. I’m going on a date with my girl tonight. Go outside and play, you know. By the way, Luna is sending you a kiss.”_

“Ah, tell her she’s a saint. How she can put up with you for so long, it’s a miracle.”

“ _It’s love, you asshole. I know it’s a weird concept for you, but some of us actually have emotional needs. I will hang up, she’s hurrying me. Take care!”_

Yifan does take care of himself by sitting in the chair, eating his macarons and watching people being pranked in the internet. It’s just a bit more comfortable than being around his lovey birds friends and weird people.

Or, maybe, just maybe, he’s just too tired to do the same thing over and over again.

Yifan is deciding if he’s going to eat the baguettes – now he realizes he is indeed eating a lot of carbs, - when he hears the knocks in the door.

“ _Hyooooye-ye-ooooon… Seulgiiiiiii…”_ a man is screaming outside. “ _Junmyeon… just… someone… let me in!”_

Yifan jumps off the chair and walks quickly to the door – he opens it so fast that the man almost falls over him. Yifan looks down at the poor guy trying to find a balance to stand up again.

“I think you’re in the wrong…” he says empathetically, but his voice dies in his throat when he realizes _who_ is there. A visibly drunk, confused and infuriatingly cute tiny baker. Kyungsoo looks up, trying to focus. Yifan realizes he’s not using his glasses and there’s no signal of contact lens. Kyungsoo is dressed in a black shirt, black tight pants and just one black sneaker. In the other foot, there’s just an oversized sock with a drawing of bears on it.

“You’re… I’m not…” Kyungsoo tries to look around, but he can’t stand properly, and he almost falls again. This time, Yifan holds him by the arm – the gentlest he can, of course. Kyungsoo smells like alcohol and smoke, two very distinctive scents, now they’re not surrounded by bread.

“The store is in the other side of the street,” Yifan says carefully, helping him to turn. He points the place, but Kyungsoo just narrows his eyes, confused. “You’re not in the bakery.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he mumbles. “I will go there… then… than… thank you.”

“There’s no one there, it’s late at night,” Yifan frowns, still not letting him go. “Do you have the keys?”

“Huh… no? I will wait,” he lifts his hand, showing his wrist. “It’s about time… where’s my watch…?”

“The real question is where’s your other shoe,” Yifan wants to laugh. How can someone look so adorable while drunk as hell?

“My shoe?” He looks down. Yifan holds him tighter, just to be sure he won’t fall. “I don’t know… I walked… a lot…”

“Where were you? What happened?”

“I was… drinking… with friends…? I drank a lot… It’s late and I… have to go to work…?” Kyungsoo mumbles, licking his lips. “I need… water.”

A self-conscious drunk. Who’s this guy?

“Okay, I have few bottles inside,” Yifan helps him to come in. “Why you don’t sit there and I’ll bring to you?”

“Wait… who are… who are you?” Kyungsoo frowns. It’s probably the first time that Yifan can see his face so close, and he’s… very attractive, even wrecked like that. His lips are red like he had applied lipstick.

“I’m Yifan. I work in the tattoo shop just across the street,” Yifan literally lifts him to move the baker to his reception couch. “I buy breads… sometimes…”

“Oh…” Kyungsoo nods, sitting down with no resistance. “You’re… Kris?”

“Kris…?” Yifan blinks. “No, Wu Yifan.”

“Hyoyeon calls you Kris…” Kyungsoo holds his face like he wants the world to stop moving. Yifan knows very well how he feels. “She gives fake names to the clients.”

“Oh,” he mumbles. “Well, I will get your water. Do you have a phone and someone I can call to warn you’re here?”

Kyungsoo lays in the couch slowly, and Yifan realizes it’s because he has to take the phone out of his pocket. His using skinny pants; the other shoe falls from his foot. He handles Yifan a dead cellphone.

“Don’t worry,” Yifan assures him. “I have a charger. I’ll go inside. Can you stay nicely there?”

Kyungsoo nods, rubbing his eyes. Yifan feels like someone is stabbing his chest repeatedly. He focus on getting the bottles and also the remaining macarons. He puts Kyungsoo’s phone in the charger and grabs his own; it’s a futile effort, because Kyungsoo is already sleeping in the couch when Yifan comes back.

“Damn,” he says to no one. Kyungsoo is curled, hugging a cushion and his feet are out of the couch. The oversized socks are almost falling on the ground.

Yifan stays there, just staring and sighing, until he hears a song. It’s an old song, and he’s pretty sure it isn’t coming from his playlist. He goes inside again. It’s Kyungsoo’s phone.

**_ninibear is calling you_ **

A gif of a bear sending little hearts makes Yifan wants to die, but he has to decide quickly if he’s going to answer. If he didn’t look like a total creep until now, maybe answering the call will show his true colors.

In the other side, he can’t just have Kyungsoo drunk in the reception forever.

He answers it.

“Hello…”

“ _Kyungsoo what the h— Kyungsoo?”_

“No. It’s Yifan, I work in—”

“ _Who are you and what are you doing to him you—”_ There’s a noise in the line. If before it sounded like it was a guy in the phone, the new voice left no doubt it’s a man. “ _Sorry. Arhhh, who’s talking?”_

“I work near Kyungsoo and he knocked on my door, drunk,” he explains quickly. “He’s here, sleeping in my shop.”

“ _Ah, thanks! We’re looking for him for hours. He drank too much in a bet and he just stormed out. Can you send us your address… Mr…?”_

“Yifan. It’s the only tattoo shop in the bakery’s street.”

_“Ah, we’re going to pick him up. Is he okay?”_

“Well, he seems… drunk,” Yifan scratches his head. He’s not exactly the best caretaker. “He’s not throwing up, for sure.”

 

Yifan waits for Kyungsoo’s friends (family? _boyfriends_?) sitting next to him. Kyungsoo is sleeping like a rock and he looks so peaceful. Yifan wants to wake him up to drink water, but it feels like a crime.

Yifan only notices he’s rubbing Kyungsoo’s ankles when the doorbell rings. He retreats his hand immediately and answers the door.

Two guys are staring at him.

“Hello?”

“… You’re the guy on the phone?” One of them asks, frowning. He’s young and has a beautiful face, like a model.

“Are you ninibear?” Yifan raises one eyebrow.

“I guess so,” he shrugs. “Where’s Kyungsoo?”

Yifan gets out of the way, showing them the couch. The model guy lets out a sigh of relief and the other laughs.

“Of course, he went to work. I was so dumb I haven’t thought about that,” the man says. “Hi, I’m Chanyeol. You’re Yifan, right?”

“Yes.”

“Thanks for watching over him,” Chanyeol says, while the other guy already ran to see Kyungsoo. “He never gets this drunk. He’s very resistant, but today he won two bets, so… We’re his roommates. We don’t live very far, but he left while we… we… we were distracted.”

“No problem,” Yifan says gently. “I knew who he was and he knows me too.”

“Don’t even try, Jongin, you know he sleeps like a rock,” Chanyeol comes in, moving his friend out of the way. Yifan almost gasps when Chanyeol puts Kyungsoo in his shoulder like a bag. “See, that’s how we do it.”

“Be careful,” Jongin slaps him. They make faces to each other before turning to Yifan.

“Thank you very much,” Jongin says, serious. Yifan nods and gives him Kyungsoo’s phone. They leave and Yifan watches them, in silence. When the car leaves, he looks at the couch, where a single shoe remains.

.

Because Yifan has to drive Luhan to the airport, Amber opens the shop in the Monday morning. Yifan has to tattoo two people, and he finds out they’re a couple as he walks in the reception. A tiny girl with platinum short hair and a stunning short guy with a funny smile.

“Hello,” he greets them. “Who will be the first?”

“Ladies first,” he says, and she slaps him, chuckling. “She’s the bravest here.”

They look at each other with love and Yifan sighs. He spent his Sunday listening Luhan’s excited speech about going home to see his baby and watching the horribly cheesy dramas Zitao chose for them. Now this.

Amber is grinning. Yifan ignores her.

The girl is indeed very brave. She’s quiet while Yifan cleans the place – the back of her arm, just over her elbow, - and she doesn’t complain about the weird position in the chair. But she laughs hard before Yifan puts the mask.

“Sorry,” she covers her mouth.

“Are you nervous?” he asks, sincerely concerned. She can’t shake her body during the session, because she asked Yifan for thin lines.

“No,” she snorts again. “I’m really sorry. It’s just… you look so scary, but you eat… like… red velvet macarons.”

It takes Yifan two seconds to understand that she was talking about the bakery’s bag in the room. He chooses not to comment and follows up tattooing her. She doesn’t make noises or move too much, only makes faces at him.

Her boyfriend is very different. Yifan is casually throwing away the bag and the guy starts a monologue.

“Ah, this room is quite nice. I like the white, red and black décor. It reminds me of White Stripes, and I’m a big fan of them. I’m a musician, too. But I know you haven’t done because of them, because I’ve noticed you have a few rap posters in your room. And you do look like a rap guy, I mean. I told this to Amber and she says you try really hard to look like a rapper.”

Yifan sighs. He’s not good at small conversations. Amber can entertain anyone, show her tattoos, make jokes… Yifan is the tattoo artist. That’s all.

“The same place than her, right?” Yifan sits next to him, pressing the drawing carefully against the man’s arm. “I had to made it shorter, because the size you wanted wouldn’t fit.”

The guy looks at his reflection and the mirror and smiles, nodding.

“It’s good, man,” he says softly. “I’m kind of exaggerate sometimes… I mean, Taeyeon knew exactly the font and the size, and I took a long time to decide it. But I wanted to do with her, even if it isn’t you know… a true couple tattoo. But after all, I already have six tattoos and she has three, and I wanted to look to the tattoo and remember that we were together when we done them.”

“Huh,” Yifan nods, helping the guy get comfortable in the chair. “That’s nice.”

“Ah, I know, right? I think that shows a lot in the tattoos we chose to do. I mean, she’s chasing peace of mind, and I think ‘serenity’ has more to do with her. I think it’s because she’s a Pisces, and everything. I’m an Aries, so peace is _not_ my thing. But I think I’m lacking inspiration lately. And I think… you know, what’s the point of doing nice things in life if you don’t have anyone to share the moment, right? So, I will chase inspiration with her. I mean, she’s my inspiration too.”

Yifan just nods. The guy talks about many things until the tattoo is done. Yifan isn’t exactly surprised to find out he’s a radio host.

“He’s nice, this Jonghyun dude,” Amber nods, walking in. Yifan is cleaning the chair. “The next tattoo is in three hours. Can we get a lunch or something?”

“I can take you out,” Yifan shrugs. “Let’s eat somewhere nice.”

“You know I’m gay, right?”

“Fuck you.”

She laughs, “I’m in. But why didn’t you take Cinderella instead? Just curious.”

Yifan turns to her, frowning.

“Cinderella?”

“Yeah,” she rubs her hand in her tank top, over the heart. “The owner of a classic high top black All Star. Girl has style. I would steal it if wasn’t just one.”

“Ah,” Yifan says. “Not a date.”

Amber stares at him for a good minute before she explodes.

“You can’t just say that,” she complains. “I want the whole story!”

“Okay, okay,” he sighs. “I will explain when we can sit down and eat.”

.

Amber chooses a burger place, which is a lot better than the food trucks that she likes so much. Yifan likes to sit down, eat in a plate, this… simple good things. At least they have clean tables and the food is… actually good. Real meat, real cheese and he can choose a burger that can satisfy him, not… small fancy food size.

“I can’t fucking believe,” she shakes her head. There’s sauce around her mouth and Yifan isn’t a methodic man, but it actually bothers him how Amber alternates between food and fries. “This story is straight up from a movie.”

“Yeah,” Yifan nods, eating his (second) fries first, like everyone should do it.

“When are you going to give back the shoe? You should ask him out!”

“I’m not going to ask him out,” he grabs his (second) burger and inspects it. “I won’t give the shoe back. He lost the other one. Why would he want just one?”

“To keep it, maybe,” Amber shrugs.

“Then he will ask for it.”

“Oh, I see,” she points, grinning. “You want him to come after you. Never thought you were the ‘ _pretending I’m not into you_ ’ type.”

Yifan just eats and hopes his glare is an understandable answer. When they’re leaving, he takes a look at the tables. There’s just couples. It would be funny if people thought they were a couple. He catches a sight of a familiar face and notices Kyungsoo’s friends. They’re both there, sitting and eating, and Chanyeol (he’s shocked he remembers their names) is feeding Jongin his burger. As he walks away, he watches them. They’re laughing and Jongin accidentally hits Chanyeol in the shoulder, and when he whines, Jongin bends in the table to give him a kiss.

Oh. They’re a couple. Of course, they’re a couple.

 

.

 

Yifan is cursed.

The entire rest of the day is made of terrifying experiences. The next tattoos are couple tattoos. When he walks out of the shop, casually staring at the bakery, he sees one of the girls who works there walking and holding hands with a (weirdly familiar) guy. He stops by a mall to buy food, and he gets a “free discount for his date” when he buys an expensive box of chocolates. He passes in front of a store, and even the cashier is watching the reprise of the goddamn drama that Zitao watches. Yifan gets in the elevator and there’s a couple holding hands already there.

“Good night,” the girl says politely. The guy nods.

“Good night,” he grunts.

He sits in the front of television and in every channel, there’s a couple. He gives up and watches We Got Married.

 

 

In his sleep, he dreams about drowning in a pink pool. He blames Nicki Minaj. Amber opens the shop because he is stuck in the traffic – he’s not going to walk and be obligated to watch even more couples. He takes thirty minutes to find a nice parking spot, and when he finally comes in, there’s already someone waiting in the reception.

It’s Kyungsoo. He’s sitting politely in the same couch he slept on. Amber, behind the reception desk, has the biggest smile on her face.

“Oh, he’s here,” she announces. “You can talk to him now. I’ll… pick a… very important thing… somewhere.”

He watches her walking away and represses a long sight. Kyungsoo stands up awkwardly and he offers a pastel green decorated box to Yifan. The baker is looking down, and he’s a bit red.

“I apologize for my behavior that day. I… never drank that much. I got sick and I came back to work today. I’m really sorry for bothering you,” he says in a paused, shy voice. “Please, accept this.”

Yifan takes the box without hesitation. It sounds like the confession from Tao’s favorite drama.

“You forgot your shoe,” Yifan mumbles. “One of them.”

“Oh,” Kyungsoo looks up; he’s not using glasses again, and his eyes look unnaturally wide now he’s surprised. He’s using a baggy green sweater and he looks… so soft. Yifan breathes deeply to avoid the urge to just smash his face against it and inhales whatever perfume Kyungsoo puts on. “I’m sorry…”

“Don’t worry,” Yifan says quickly. “I was just wondering if you wanted it back.”

“I don’t remember when I lost my shoe… my shoes,” he says, biting his lips. Yifan feels like he’s still cursed. “I was just walking… I… don’t know. You can throw away. No, no, let me do it. You already had a lot of unnecessary effort in my behalf.”

Yifan frowns.

“Calm down,” he chuckles, because he can’t help it. Kyungsoo is… too much. “It wasn’t a burden for me. I just talked to your friends and they came to pick you up.”

“Ah, yes. I… don’t drink that much… it was just…”

“But you smoke. Right?”

Kyungsoo looks surprised again.

“Yes,” the baker says shyly. “Sometimes.”

Yifan nods slowly. Seeing Kyungsoo like this, in the morning, dressed like an old man, looking cozy and sleepy in his way to bake colorful and tasty little breads and desserts, he realizes he doesn’t know much about his life. He drinks, smokes, uses tight black pants and walks around by himself.

That doesn’t make him less cute, but…

A girl opens the door and Yifan wakes up of his thoughts. Amber comes in ‘coincidentally’, and Kyungsoo seems tense.

“Again, I’m sorry. I will leave now… Thank you for taking care of me.”

He leaves so fast that Yifan can’t even finish his mumbling ‘it was nothing’. Amber slaps her own chest.

“Ah… so adorable.…” she smiles. “Ah, you must be Haseul, right?”

 

YIfan talks to the girl briefly and comes in. Before getting ready, he inspects the box.

Pizza bread and macarons.

 

.

 

Yifan thought the best place to tell Zitao about what happened was in the MAC Store – he would be too distracted to overreact. But that was what Yifan _thought_ it would happen.

“And you didn’t ask him out?” Zitao screamed, angrily shaking a primer in front of Yifan’s face. “What— what the—”

“Calm down,” Yifan holds his friend’s arm. Every girl in the store is staring at them; they’re the only guys there and it’s already hard not to spot them anywhere. “It happened too fast!”

“You’re such a coward,” Zitao shakes his arm until Yifan let go. “You know where he works. Just go there and talk to him!”

“I will look like a fucking creep!”

“You’re a creep! Accept yourself!”

Yifan rolls his eyes.

“I’m not going to ask him out now. It will look weird.”

ZItao shakes his head, but he looks like he’s accepting it. He makes a gesture to the attendant to approach them.

“Hey, can you put this primer with the other things I chose? I’ll take it,” he smiles until she leaves and then turns to Yifan, serious. “Take me to the bakery.”

“What?!” Yifan laughs nervously. “No.”

“I won’t say anything,” Zitao says impatiently. “I’m not Luhan, okay? I’m giving you my word I’m not going to do anything you don’t want me to.”

Well, Tao does keep his promises, most of the times.

“What are you going to do there?”

“First, eat. You talking about pizza bread, cake and shit made me really hungry,” Tao shrugs. Yifan mouths ‘typical’. “Second, I want to see this man who stole your heart. I mean, is he real? He sounds like an imaginary boyfriend.”

Yifan hits him in the arm playfully.

“He would be my imaginary husband by now.”

Zitao clutches his chest dramatically.

“This is… so adorable!”

“Go pay your bill.”

 

Unfortunately, they arrive at the bakery before the rush; the sun is still up, but it’s a pretty evening. Now, only the people who came to sit in the pastel tables to take pictures and chat are around and they can’t hide behind the crowd. Zitao screeches the whole time, and his eyes sparkle when he sees the desserts.

“Ah, so cute,” he says, touching the glass. “I will pick at least one of everything.”

“The worst part is that you actually can eat it everything,” Yifan grunts. Now, he only sees two girls and the random guy who shows up once in a while.

“Hello, how can I help you,” Joohyun says, smiling. Zitao looks up and coos.

“Oh, even the cashiers are pretty,” he says, shocked. “Oh my god, lady, you’re beautiful!”

“Can you control himself just for a minute?” Yifan whispers, kicking Zitao’s ankles.

“Ah, stop, you ogle,” he complains. “Don’t worry, lady. I’m gay. I was just mesmerized by your beauty, I’m not hitting on you. No one hits on anyone here, apparently.”

“Ah, thank you,” she chuckles, watching how Yifan glares at his friend. “I assume that you will want the same order, Mr.?”

“No, thank you,” Yifan says politely. “The weird guy with me will choose whatever he wants.”

“I want a slice from every cake, one of every dessert, a bag with at least one of every type of bread you have,” Zitao points. “And a cup of tea.”

Joohyun just stares for a while and then nods and write it down.

“Ok… I will… for here or to go?” She asks, a bit scared.

“Ah, the cake is to go,” Zitao says peacefully until Yifan kicks him again. “And the bread too… oh my god. Calm down. It’s what I eat normally.”

“Sehun says you should stop eating so much sugar.”

“Sehun drinks five bubble tea a day,” Zitao almost screams. “Sehun blah blah stop blah blah sugar!”

“How old are you?” Yifan shakes his head.

Joohyun leaves, covering her mouth to laugh.

“Can we sit outside?” Zitao says. “That would look good in my Instagram.”

“Outside you won’t see him,” Yifan raise an eyebrow. Zitao laughs hard.

“Ah, and do you really want that, right?”

“Well, you accused me of imagining him, so—”

Yifan turns back when he hears a familiar voice. Kyungsoo’s head is popping from the kitchen’s door.

“… ask him if he can take the bread when he leaves,” he tells Joohyun. He’s using an apron and he looks cute as hell. “The cinnamon ones will be ready in less than an hour.”

“Is it him?” Zitao whispers, excited.

“Okay, I will,” the girl nods. For a second, Kyungsoo looks at them and they make eye contact. YIfan nods nervously and Kyungsoo blinks, disappearing in the kitchen.

“Oh,” Zitao says. “ _It is_ him.”

 

After taking every possible #instafood pic, Zitao finally started to eat. Yifan stole few pieces and he was brutally punished for it. To complete his bad luck (he was really cursed), Luhan saw the pictures and send a thousand messages complaining because Zitao met “the crush” before he could do it.

Yifan is still sitting at the table two hours after they arrived.

“You know I have a client to attend in like, twenty minutes,” Yifan sighs.

“And you’re like, a minute from your store,” Zitao points. “Can you just sit and enjoy food like a human being?”

“Excuse me,” a deep voice draws their attention. Kyungsoo is just standing next to their table, apron in his hands. He smells like bread. “I— We finished… your order. I’m sorry it took too long.”

He looks at Yifan and nods timidly.

“No problem at all,” Zitao laughs. “Thank you. I’m sure it’s delicious. My friend here always talks about these breads. You’re getting him fat.”

Yifan would complain, but it’s the second time he hears that. Maybe he should care at bit more about what he’s eating.

“Ah, don’t worry,” Kyungsoo says, chuckling. “I always eat them, but I don’t really gain weight. I guess the rest of the diet should be more restrictive, if you don’t want to cut bread, but it’s fine.”

“You’re lucky, then,” Zitao smiles, winking. “I mean, I work out a lot, otherwise I couldn’t go in these macarons. Do you drink too?”

Kyungsoo blushes immediately. Yifan would punch Zitao if he wasn’t fascinated by it.

“Sometimes…”

“Ah, that’s the real deal. No one really pay attention in drinks calories and they have a lot? And we don’t control that,” Zitao keeps talking innocently, but Yifan knows him very well. “We get wasted and we don’t even care, right?”

“You can leave if you want too,” Yifan says gently. “He talks a lot when he wants to.”

Kyungsoo smiles timidly.

“Ah… about… err… my shoe.”

“Amber threw it away. Or stole it, I’m not sure,” Yifan smiles back. “No need to worry.”

Kyungsoo just nods and leaves. Zitao has a huge grin in his face.

“I know what you were trying to do,” Yifan narrows his eyes.

“Me? I did nothing,” he raises a finger. “Like you, dumbass. He likes you. Ask him out.”

sd

.

 

Yifan accepts his destiny. He’s stuck in Loveland.

He goes to the movies and there’s only romantic comedies or love dramas. He passes by a library and the “romance” books are on sale. He gets in the elevator and the tv shows a dating app advertising. He opens the newspaper and the first thing he sees is an article talking about male loneliness in the country – in this one, he feels personally attacked.

 **z.tao:** come w/ us to a party today

 **wufan:** I don’t wanna see couples. Why would I go out with a couple?

 **z.tao:** it’s going to fuuuuunnn!!!!

 **z.tao:** hunnie has a free pass 4 a party by SUPREME

 **wufan:** I don’t even like the brand.

 **z.tao:** ya fucking liar you have a bag

 **wufan:** Just one bag? Let me live.

 

“Who are you texting? Bambi?” Amber comes in easily, there’s no one anymore to talk to. The trend on minimal tattoos may give Yifan more free time, after all. He had done three tattoos, each one in less than an hour.

“No, Bambi only texts when he’s coming back,” Yifan yawns. Amber laughs. “What?”

“Man, you’re old,” she shakes her head. “So, who’s the one? I know it isn’t Cinderella, because you’re not a great Prince Charming. You look like the dragon who guards the princess.”

“Well, it’s Zitao. He wants me to go to a party.”

“Tell him that if he wants you to go, he has to put me and Luna in.”

“What?”

 

Yifan knows he’s stuck in Loveland when instead of going with a couple, he’s stuck in the middle of two. He’s in the backseat of the car, smashed against the corner, because Zitao won’t drink. Why? Because he has to answer the phone in case of the vet calls him. Yifan had to listen to a thirty-minute conversation about how Candy is not doing well lately, including Sehun’s monologue of “you’re feeding her too much human food”, and then the consequential argument of the concept of humanity and nutrition. But of course, the worst part was being stuck with the ladies discussing their upcoming marriage and the small details. Apparently, everyone in the car knows about event planning but Yifan.

He’s done.

“Guys, can I ask you something,” he says, inclining himself to be heard by the driver. “Can you stop in the next place with beers and just drop me?”

“Ah, come on,” Zitao complains. “You’re all dressed up and you’re not going?”

“If I stay one minute more in this car, I’ll die,” he says sincerely.

“Let him go, this bitter old ass wants to go, let him,” Amber makes faces at him. “There’s a nice karaoke in the next corner. He will like it, there’s a pool table and everything. Very manly.”

“Fine,” Sehun grunts. “But this is the last time I invite you to a party.”

 

Yifan gets out of the car and for a moment, he regrets his decision. The place is too small, smells like smoke and the door is crowded with people in leather jacket and raggy jeans. Some of them stare at him, in his fine Saint Laurent button up and his well hydrated skin. He passes by them and walks to the bar. The barman is a skinny, short and smiley guy in a Beatles shirt – which is fun, because they’re playing Beatles in a vintage jukebox.

“Wow,” the man says, faking surprise. “It’s like those fashion magazines but in real life.”

“This is your best pick-up line?” Yifan raises one eyebrow, sitting in the uncomfortably small seat.

“Actually, no. I’ve lost my swag when I started dating,” he shrugs, and he picks a Stella Artois, throwing it to Yifan, who catches the beer easily. “Ah, I knew it. You look like a basketball guy.”

“I used to play. But how did you know about the beer?”

“Ah, too fancy for a Heineken guy. If you use BB cream, then you’re not afraid of drinking a Stella…”

“I’m not using BB cream.”

“Damn,” the barman laughs, impressed. “I’m Jongdae. Ask for anything if you need to.”

“I heard there’s a pool table here,” Yifan says casually, opening the bottle. “I would like to try.”

“In the corner, right,” Jongdae points, smiling. “Not the karaoke, man? Gotta give a try.”

“I’m not a singing dude.”

“You could at least try. Little Darth Vader won the pool party contest and the singing contest, and I would love to see someone beating his ass…”

“Not today,” Yifan gets up, sighing. He walks slowly, inspecting the people around him. Some of the girls look nice, but the guys look too straight. He spots the pool table, but someone grabs him before he can go there.

“Heeey, aren’t you… god, I forgot your name,” Yifan turns to the origin of the voice and faces one of Kyungsoo’s friend. Chanyeol.

“Yifan,” he mumbles, confused. “What are…?”

“If you’re going to ask me what I’m doing here, the answer is taking care of this sleepy drunk,” Chanyeol points, with his beer (a Heineken) to a man sleeping in the couch. The other friend.

“Ah,” Yifan nods.

“And what are you doing here?” he smiles. Chanyeol is dressed in flannels and a dusty jumper. “Did you come to see Kyungsoo win?”

“What?” Yifan looks around. He can only see Kyungsoo after a while; his small figure was hidden behind many tall man, all of then holding pool cues and beers. Kyungsoo now look more like the drunk version of him; he’s in his all black, looking at the table in a focused way, his lips ghosting the bottle finish.

“Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol screams. “Look who I’ve found!”

Kyungsoo looks up fast, too fast for Yifan to hide somewhere. They make eye contact and Kyungsoo widens his eyes behind his glasses.

“Hi,” Yifan says loudly and instantly regrets it.

“Hi,” Kyungsoo says back, still surprised.

“Do you know how to play?” Chanyeol asks. “I’m not very good. I think tall people are bad at this because the short ones can see the table better. Or bend less, I don’t know.”

“No, I don’t,” Yifan lies absently. It’s hard to focus in anything but Kyungsoo tiny smile directed at him. “Never tried to play it. I like… more physical games…”

“Kyungsoo is the master of this shit, man,” Chanyeol says proudly. “You should just ask him to teach you. Right, Kyungsoo?”

“I can help you,” Kyungsoo says and his grip in the pool cue is tightening.

A man sitting in the corner of the table seems offended, “You’ll drop the competition, dude?”

“What competition,” Kyungsoo stares at him defiantly. “Even Jongin sleeping has more chance to win than you, Heechul.”

“Ah, you’re too mean, baby boy,” the man laughs. “Be respectful to elders.”

Kyungsoo laughs too. It’s huge smile that accentuates his cheeks and makes him look like a mischievous kid. Yifan has to admit he has a crush, after all. He feels a wave of bravery hitting him and he walks to the baker with no hesitation.

“So, what do I have to do?”

“Oh, it’s quite simple,” Kyungsoo says nodding. “You have to put the colored balls in the holes just by hitting them with the clear ball. You only have one move. I can show you.”

Kyungsoo bends gracefully, placing the pool cue between his fingers; with his other hand, he holds it and pushes it against the white ball after calculating the right spot. The clear ball hits two balls in the corner and one of them disappears in the hole.

“See?” he turns to Yifan, smiling. “You don’t have to do it with force. Just try to imagine what course the balls will follow if you hit them.”

Yifan nods. Kyungsoo offers him the pool cue and Yifan picks it carefully. He imitates Kyungsoo’s position, aiming at the red ball.

Kyungsoo touches his ear. “Try to create a friction between the pool cue and your fingers. They control how much the cue can slide on the table.”

Yifan nods again, doing as he is told. He was good at mathematic and physics, and that’s what this game is about, after all. Yifan glances at Kyungsoo; he’s waiting, looking expectantly at Yifan’s hand.

He’s not the one calling the shots.

.

 

 

It’s a pleasant to spend time with Kyungsoo's friends.

They're quite nice, after all.  Chanyeol is too loud, but he's naturally funny and easy going, Jongin is sleepy and pouty but he's just sweet, and once in a while this Jongdae's guy just pops from nowhere and joins them. But, of course, it's even better to just hear Kyungsoo talking. He's not as shy as Yifan thought; or maybe it's because he's drinking. They know a lot about music, making refined criticism to few songs and to the people singing them. Kyungsoo has a habit of widening his eyes when he wants to talk and Yifan just can't handle that.

“You don't talk much, right?” Jongin asks, leaning into Yifan's personal space. They're sitting in the raggy couches in the corner of the pool table, now that Jongin is just sitting and kind of awake. “I can see why Kyungsoo likes you.”

“Sometimes I do,” Yifan glances at Kyungsoo, just to see how embarrassed he is, but after the third beer, he can barely blush anymore. “But I'm enjoying just listen to you.”

“Tell something about you,” Chanyeol asks. “Not like what we already know. I mean, we know you do tattoos and you like bread and...”

“Let him speak,” Jongin complains. He's chewing a gun, just to keep his eyes open.

“I don't know. I like cars and taking naps,” Yifan shrugs.

“Do you have a hobby or something?” Jongin asks.

“I like watching movies,” Yifan confesses. “I wanted to be an actor when I was a kid.”

Jongin and Chanyeol stare at each other and then laugh loudly.

“What?” Yifan mumbles, confused.

“So did Kyungsoo. He wanted to be an actor for a long time,” Chanyeol says proudly. “He also loves drama and all that shit.”

Yifan smiles, but even before he can turn to see Kyungsoo's reaction, the baker stands up.

“I'll smoke outside, if you excuse me,” he says in a tiny voice, storming out of the bar. He's small, but fast. Yifan normally would wait for a signal from his friends, but now he knows he's having the opportunity. He can't have Tao screaming at him again.

He excuses himself too, grab a beer with Jongdae and, casually walks to the smoking area. Kyungsoo is alone, of course. For some reason, Yifan knows that he wouldn't just stand there with someone else. The cigarette is between his fingers and he's just staring at the street.

“Hey,” Yifan says, too quietly for a crowded place, but Kyungsoo hears him.

“Hey,” he tries to smile.

“Don't worry about your friends. Mine are pretty embarrassing too,” Yifan says, approaching him carefully. “They always tell people how I always trip on nothing.”

“Is it true?” Kyungsoo turns to him, amused.

“Unfortunately, it is,” Yifan smiles. Kyungsoo smiles back, now more genuine. “Long legs. I can't see the ground often.”

“Can't relate,” Kyungsoo retorts. Yifan laughs, pleased, and somehow, the vision of the baker smoking quietly isn't as bad as he thought it would be. They just stay in silence for a while; it's not uncomfortable. Yifan likes that.

Kyungsoo lets the cigarette butt fall on the ground and steps on it, “I'm really sorry if they...”

He takes a long breath before continuing to talk.

“...if they keep pushing you... to, like... They think I should...”

He's embarrassed, fidgeting with his pockets. Yifan just has to lift his chin with a finger and bend down to shush him. Yifan is being intentionally slow, just in case Kyungsoo doesn't want to...

Kyungsoo puts a hand on Yifan's shoulder when their lips touch. Yifan leans back.

“Just... let me take my glasses off,” he breathes out. “So we can...”

Yifan waits and his heart is beating fast while he watches how Kyungsoo keeps his glasses carefully in his back pocket. Suddenly, all the guts he had to kiss Kyungsoo just... evaporate. He can't concentrate with all the noise, the smells, the lights around them.

Lucky for him, Kyungsoo takes the lead. He pushes down Yifan so easily that the crashes of their lips feel natural, quite ordinary. It calms him the way Kyungsoo smells like smoke, and his mouth tastes a bit like beer. He finally feels safe again to hold Kyungsoo and press him gently against the wall.

It's a good, hard kiss and he just realizes that they were so awkward before because they couldn't touch each other. Now, it's fluidic, there's a good rhythm, an easy reading. Kyungsoo has a good grip in his neck, and Yifan holds his waits, caressing it intently. The short breaks between kisses are excuses to let their faces touch, and it feels oddly intimate.

“I'm sorry,” a voice near them says. “I would cough, but it's too cliché.”

Yifan actually needs a few seconds to regain his control after they stop kissing.

“Hey,” Kyungsoo says; besides his red lips, he seems unaffected.

“Your friends left,” Jongdae says calmly now Yifan notices he was the one who interrupted them. “They paid your bill and said that you should keep your money so you can spend at a love hotel.”

“Subtle,” Kyungsoo mumbles and they put a space between their bodies unconsciously. “Thanks for warning me.”

“No problem,” Jongdae winks, and leaves.

Now, it's awkward again.

“Uhnm,” Yifan grunts. “Do you want to...”

Kyungsoo stares at him expectantly.

“... I don't know. Maybe come home with me?”

Kyungsoo presses his lips together in a line, considering it. Yifan breathes deeply.

“I... I don't,” he bites his lips and avoids eye contact. “I don't really do this. Casual stuff.”

“Oh,” Yifan mumbles. He's been talking about Kyungsoo for so long that he actually forgot that this is the first time they're... well, hanging out.

“I'm sorry,” Kyungsoo says, looking up. “I like you, but... I need... time to feel comfortable with... intimate things. We just...”

“No, you don't have to apologize,” Yifan says quickly. “It's okay.”

Kyungsoo nods slowly and somehow Yifan can swear he can see a dark cloud forming over his head. He's worrying about something; his body is shrinking.

“If you want to,” Yifan says softly – and he barely recognizes his own tone. “We can just watch a movie. Tomorrow I can drive you home or to work.”

Kyungsoo seems surprised. He opens his mouth to say something and then, closes it, unsure. After few seconds, he nods.

“Okay.”

.

 

 

The materialization of Yifan's curse is the sleeping guy on his couch.

Kyungsoo fell asleep in the first thirty minutes of _La La Land,_ which is no surprise, because it’s boring as hell. But, looking at the bright side, Yifan learned that Kyungsoo really like musicals, tap dance, old songs and holding hands. Yifan was a bit nervous in the beginning, but now, stuck in the same place, he’s a bit afraid of letting go of his hold and wake Kyungsoo.

 He’s consequently obligated to watch the next hour of the movie. And he watches until the end, even when Kyungsoo moves in his sleep, allowing him to slide his hand away, because the movies ends up being not so boring.

Yifan gets up, picks a thick blanket and cover Kyungsoo. He stays in the room for a while, just in case of Kyungsoo wakes up, but he finally leaves to his bed after removing the glasses carefully from Kyungsoo’s face.

 

He wakes up a bit startled and the first thing he does is to check on the man in his couch.

Kyungsoo is still sleeping, now in a fetal position.

Yifan sighs.

Fondly.

He puts all the food he can find in the table. He even checks Tao’s Instagram with the pics of his “breakfast-in-bed-to-hunnie” to adjust the composition aesthetically – he just found out he has to open the jar slightly to make it look better. He washes his face, changes his clothes – ten minutes to find clothes that says “Lazy in the morning, but I still look good” – and he just waits.

During the thirty-eight minutes that he has to patiently wait, he feels… anxious. A part of him screams that he’s ridiculous and he’s just embarrassing himself. Most of Yifan’s hook ups (that involves sex, not musicals and hand holding) just end before its time to sleep. None of the people actually stay for breakfast – and he never really asks them to stay, of course. Maybe it’s because he’s inexperienced, but he feels… out of the place.

Kyungsoo wakes up slowly. He sits up, rubs his eyes and looks around for a long time, frowning. Yifan gets worried. Is he upset?

He tries to stand up and he keeps frowning and walking slowly. He almost trips in a pillow on the floor.

Ah! His glasses.

Yifan jumps off the chair and offers Kyungsoo the glasses he put ceremoniously over the table the night before. Kyungsoo mumbles _thanks_ and puts them on, blinking.

“Hello,” Yifan says.

“Hello,” Kyungsoo whispers, inspecting the place. “I fell asleep… I don’t really remember when…”

“Ah, in the beginning of the movie. It was… a nice movie.”

“I’m really sorry,” Kyungsoo rubs his own arm. “I… get sleepy when I drink. I shouldn’t have come.”

“No, it wasn’t a problem,” Yifan shrugs. “Do you want to eat breakfast?”

“I don’t want to bother you anymore. I will just leave,” Kyungsoo lifts his hands. “What time is it? It must be late.”

“I insist,” Yifan says, serious. “It’s early in the morning. I told you I would drive you home or to work.”

“I don’t work today,” Kyungsoo nods. “You… don’t have to.”

But Yifan wants to, even if he’s just acting by his intuition, not really thinking about it.

“I… put the…” he points to the table. Kyungsoo’s mouth makes an ‘O’. “I didn’t want you to be hungry in the morning. You work in a bakery, so…”

That doesn’t even make sense. Yifan wants to punch himself. Kyungsoo nods slowly, and he looks sad. He asks to wash his face and mouth before eating and YIfan tries to sit naturally while showing off his strong arms.

Kyungsoo isn’t interested in anything else but the food when he comes back. He eats like he’s hungry, but he still looks sad. They don’t talk until the baker finishes his meal.

“I’m sorry,” Kyungsoo says suddenly. “Lately I can’t eat in the morning because the smell of bread makes me sick. I… I’m not used to… not cooking my breakfast. Chanyeol knows how to cook dinner, but Jongin is a kitchen terrorist. I always cook in the mornings, even when I’m not working.”

Yifan doesn’t know if he pays attention in the voice or the fact that Kyungsoo is actually sharing a part of his everyday life.

“Ah, that’s fine, I don’t eat at home often,” Yifan says and he starts to mumble. “Huh, why do… I… feel like…”

“Huh?” Kyungsoo leans in, turning his head to listen better.

“I feel like you don’t like your job,” Yifan says. He’s not the best at stringing people along.

“Ah,” Kyungsoo leans back, straightening up his posture. “I… It’s not like that. I… like my friends. I like cooking. It’s just…”

He looks away, his eyes now on Yifan’s framed drawings, but he seems like he’s mind wandering, too far away.

“… I used to think I would be a great cook. I worked hard for that. But… I’m just working to pay my debts,” he continues, sighing. “And I’m not… I don’t feel like I’m fitting in. I don’t like… the bakery is… the things in there… they’re too…”

“Girly,” Yifan nods.

Kyungsoo stares at him, surprised, “yeah.”

“I noticed you don’t like to wear the headbands or the tags,” Yifan tries to say casually, but maybe Tao’s right. He’s a creep.

“I’m not offended,” Kyungsoo says quickly. “I understand that is part of the… marketing strategy. But I’m… I’m a cook. It’s hard for people to take me seriously normally. If I wear those things…”

Yifan blinks. If it annoys him, a big, large and the owner of a very natural resting bitchface, to be seen as… not manly, he couldn’t even imagine what feels like for someone that looks like Kyungsoo.

“I’m… I don’t think that’s anything wrong with liking those things,” Kyungsoo says, serious. “But I’m… people look at me… and they say things… and that just based on what they see… they don’t even know I’m…”

Yifan waits for the answer, but Kyungsoo only blushes and looks down.

Oh.

Ooooooh (Why is he even surprised? They made out last night.).

“I’m… I’m not into girly things too. I mean, I’m saying this, but… if my best friend could hear me, he would hit me and call me sexist and shit. I try not to…” Yifan stops talking, because it doesn’t seem like Kyungsoo isn’t getting any better. “… Do you want to… go out or something?”

“I… want to go home,” Kyungsoo says quietly.

Yifan thinks about holding his hand, but it’s too far from him to reach it.

 

.

 

“I need a vacation,” he announced to Amber on Monday, after two days of staring at his phone. He asked for Kyungsoo’s number, of course, but calling him or just sending a message is… a bit different.

“I need one too,” she says, lazily turning the page of a magazine on the desk. “I can’t stand you staring at the bakery with this angsty face. It feels like a telenovela. Don Kyungsoo of le bread stole your heart and abandoned you, pregnant and in a wedding dress, Señora Wu?”

Yifan sighs and shakes his head, but he knows he has no right to be angry. She’s right.

“I hate your Spanish classes,” he grunts.

“Too bad… Luna loves it. The moon of my life,” Amber lifts one eyebrow, pointing a finger at him. “You should try. Talking dirty in Spanish is very effective.”

“I never did that,” Yifan confesses. He doesn’t bother to explain what. She knows what it is. “Do you know I never did that?”

“Well, I guess it is time for you to get down of your pedestal and call someone back,” she shrugs. “It’s no humiliation. It’s just how life works.”

“I don’t think he likes being chased,” Yifan says, sitting down in the couch Kyungsoo slept on. “He… He doesn’t like girly things… you know, maybe he doesn’t feel comfortable with me leading… because he… he doesn’t like…”

“You don’t have to explain this to me, I know it very well. I got people asking where my breast is, like, every day in that specific tone that shows me they’re not talking exactly about my body. I can’t judge him. Sometimes, it feels safer to conform,” she says absently, like she’s reciting a recipe. “But it feels nice that you thought that way. I can’t believe you actually got this level of overthinking just to make this guy feel more comfortable.”

“You sound like you think I’m an insensitive jerk,” Yifan complains.

“You aren’t,” Amber smiles. “But sometimes you try really hard to be one.”

Yifan stares at the bakery again.

“Can I cancel tomorrow tattoos?” He asks hopefully.

“Well, you can. But you’ll have to refund them,” she says quietly. “And we need the money, man. I need to get married. I will cancel your role as one of my best men.”

Yifan wishes he could forget that Amber created a male version of bridesmaids and he’s one of them. He wants to forget he’s going to a marriage, anyway. But after Candy’s baptism, nothing is _that_ bad.

“I can’t focus,” Yifan says quietly. “Maybe I’m sick. I don’t even remember the last time I was sick.”

“You’re getting old, bro. One more year and you’ll reach the big three point zero,” she whistles. “Also, you’re falling in love.”

Yifan stares at her.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she laughs. “This is no news.”

.

 

 

The thing is: Yifan’s not ready to be in love.

There’s no manual for that, after all. And he barely knows this guy. He was joking around with the crush thing, but now it feels too real for him to just ignore it. Love feels like… something too far away for him to reach. People like Luhan or Tao fall in love – because love is soft. Yifan is a rough man and all those things haunting him just don’t fit in his life. Weird dramas, red velvet macarons, couple tattoos, watching musicals while holding hands. That’s not… his things.

He thinks about that while closing the shop. Amber grabs his shoulder empathetically, and, before leaving, tells him softly,

“I was asking myself when you would realize you can’t keep your lifestyle forever. But now, it’s even deeper. Maybe you’ll see you have things in common with your cinderella.”

He’s too tired to think and he lets her go home without an answer. He walks to his car – he shouldn’t have drove to work, now he has to attentive, - and shakes his keys, distracted. It’s late and he just want some warm chocolate and go to bed. Maybe he’s really getting old.

“…hello,” says a voice. Yifan jumps, startled, but he only gets scared when he realizes there’s no one there.

“Not today, satan,” he says automatically, because Tao says that all the time, but now he said it, he’s not really sure if it’s the right context to use it.

“… down here,” the deep voice sighs. “God, this is humiliating.”

Yifan looks down.

Kyungsoo is standing next to the car.

“Oh, hello,” Yifan breathes out, realizing he’s clutching his chest. “Don’t stay in silence in the dark using all black unless you’re a ninja.”

“Sorry,” he says, smiling. He’s just like any other day, cute and always a bit shy. “I… just wanted to talk to you. I didn’t want to talk… in the middle of your shop…”

“That’s fine,” Yifan nods. “Wanna go somewhere?”

Kyungsoo looks at him, surprised. He really wants to attack Yifan today.

“We… we can talk here,” he says. “I will be brief.”

“No way,” Yifan grins. “You scare me to death. Let’s go to a place where we can see each other faces, at least.”

Kyungsoo seems to be thinking about that. He bites his lips and nods. Yifan opens the car door for him and Kyungsoo frowns, but it’s too late.

“I do that for my friends too,” he explains quickly. “Luhan hates it, but it’s a habit.”

Yifan keeps his weird things in the backseat and takes a look at Kyungsoo pulling the seatbelt like a kid. He was quiet when Yifan took him home and he didn’t want his friends to see them, but now he looks a bit calmer.

“Who’s Luhan?” Kyungsoo asks and Yifan realizes he’s staring.

“One of my best friends,” Yifan says, starting the engine. “He doesn’t deserve this title. He likes my other friend best, because they can do couple things together. Or anything together. I’m not… very accessible.”

“Ah, I know how that feels,” Kyungsoo mumbles. “At least they’re not dating. That would suck, I guarantee you.”

Yifan snorts. He drives easily, choosing the chill soundtrack – he noticed Kyungsoo and his friends know a lot about music, so maybe his loop of trap music wouldn’t be the best choice.

“Where are we going?” Kyungsoo asks suddenly. Yifan blinks.

“I… to a restaurant…?” He almost stutters. “I hope you don’t mind if… we have a meal? It’s on me.”

“No problem,” Kyungsoo says quietly. “I was going home, anyway.”

Good. Now Yifan has to find a nice place to take a cook. A fucking cook. Great. Yifan wasn’t even thinking about where they were going; he has this type of feeling around Kyungsoo, like he’s already in the right place when they’re together.

“Huh,” he tries. “What’s your favorite kind of food?”

“I like meat,” Kyungsoo says shyly. “But I’m okay with anything, really.”

“Nice. Meat? I know the right place,” Yifan lies. He uses the first red light to search in his phone _best place eat meat_ and there’s a place near them. He sighs relieved (and discreetly). The place is a beautiful, fancy looking place and Yifan is ready to bribe _anyone_ to get in without a reservation. He waits for Kyungsoo and he’s not sure if he should… do anything.

The image of Zitao screaming while buying make up appears on his mind.

Discreetly, he bends and takes Kyungsoo’s hands on his. He looks to the place, to avoid Kyungsoo’s eyes and just walks. Eventually, Kyungsoo’s tiny and flexible fingers hold his hand a bit tighter and Yifan finally can breathe.

Lucky for him, he doesn’t have to bribe anyone. There’s a table for two, because apparently Monday isn’t the most romantic day.

“What are you going to choose?” Kyungsoo asks, seeming to be concerned. He’s staring at the menu.

“I always ask for the waiter’s advice,” Yifan says sincerely. “Maybe the chef’s suggestion… I think they know best. At least, they know more than me.”

“Oh,” Kyungsoo says with a minuscule smile. “I’ll do the same, then.”

It’s nice until the waiter leaves. They have to stare at each other for few minutes and… it’s kind of awkward.

“What… did you want to talk about?” Yifan asks the softest he can. By the way Kyungsoo’s eyes widens, he’s wasn’t very successful at that. “I mean… you wanted to talk to me.”

“I did,” the baker says slowly. “I wanted to ask you a question.”

Yifan puts his hands down on the table ceremoniously slow.

“Yes?” He’s sweating, even with the AC blasting on the restaurant.

“I… I just want… to know… what exactly do you want with me?” He says serious – a bit shy, but definitely knowing what he’s doing.

“What do you mean?” Yifan frowns. “I thought it was really clear.”

“It’s…” Kyungsoo sighs, pressing his lips in a line. “I… I know what guys like you look for when they come to me. I… don’t mind if you… tell me the truth. I just… don’t like complicated things. I think it’s the best for both of us if we’re being clear.”

Yifan gapes at him.

“Guys… like me?” He asks cautiously.

“Yes.”

“Sorry,” Yifan shakes his head, trying to focus. “But what type of guy am I? I mean, in this… logic?”

“Conventionally attractive. A “ten”,” he made those air quotes like he was a reporter on television. “Driving around town with hot girls.”

Yifan is speechless. He never thought he would listen to those words and feel offended.

“What?”

“Am I lying?” Kyungsoo asks dryly. “You live in the same building that my friend lives. He said that you came home late with a different girl every night for a while.”

Yifan’s mouth must be hitting the table by now.

“I’m not judging,” Kyungsoo explains, now softly. “I… just don’t want to get attached to a guy who’s going to kick me after sex and then find a girlfriend and live happily after while I’m sulking. If this is just… sex things, then I want you to know I’m fine with it, but you have to be sincere.”

Yifan still can’t react. Kyungsoo stares, serious.

He opens his mouth, closes it and then a spirit must have possessed his body, because he says:

“When I sell my paintings, I will buy a mansion in China for us.”

Yifan covers his own mouth.

What?

What’s wrong with his brain?

Kyungsoo stares, gaping at him.

“Your entry,” the waiter appears from nowhere, holding both plates. It’s a decorated roll and it smell delicious. Yifan is still mortified, but he takes a bite.

“…I think…” Kyungsoo says, frowning and staring at his roll. “It’s too early for us to live together. In another country…”

“I’m really sorry, I wasn’t—”

“… but I think we could date for now?” He asks, and he sounds half-hopeful, half-confused.

Yifan is surprised, but he nods eagerly. They eat and stay in silence until their plates are removed from the table.

“I don’t want to intrude,” Yifan tries, when he’s sure he won’t say another dumb thing. “But… were you… or your friend stalking me?”

“Oh, no. He just commented because he noticed you work in the shop. He thought it was a funny coincidence,” Kyungsoo answers, a bit embarrassed. “I’m sorry if it sounded like I was… a creep.”

“No,” Yifan snorts. _My, my. How the tables have turned._

“A lot of guys come to me because they think I look… I look like someone they can… fuck. And then go back to their girlfriends or…” Kyungsoo says and his tone has a slight sadness. “And you’re like… you. It’s weird you’re not interested in someone like… Chanyeol or Jongin. I mean, besides a girl. I’m really sorry if I was judgmental. It’s just trying to protect myself.”

“No. I wasn’t offended. You weren’t lying, anyway,” Yifan sighs. Kyungsoo asked him to be clear, so he has to. “I’m not used to compromise or have a long-term relationship. Or… to be seen… with a guy.”

Kyungsoo stares at him, waiting.

“But I guess it’s what I’m doing now,” he continues, smiling. “I like you.”

Kyungsoo blushes, looking down. It’s offensively cute. Yifan barely notices how easy it was to confess.

Kyungsoo coughs and then says,

“I’m… I’m going to see a play this Friday. I asked Jongin and Chanyeol to come with me, but they don’t want to,” he rolls his eyes. “Do you want to come with me? I can get tickets for your friends too.”

“Yes,” Yifan agrees, but he would rather die than inviting Tao or Luhan to see him in a date. “I’ll go with you. Why your friends don’t want to go? It’s boring?”

“They will probably have sex. They do it a lot,” Kyungsoo says, tired. “Oh… I haven’t told you. That was the reason I left home in that night I went to the shop. They were so loud I couldn’t stand being near them, even drunk.”

YIfan laughs loudly.

“Really,” Kyungsoo smiles sheepishly. “And they’re both clumsy. They always break something or cause an accident. It’s a mess. The things I had to clean…”

Yifan is almost crying of laughter. When he can speak again, he confesses:

“I didn’t want to bring my friends because one of them talks to his boyfriend in that voice for dogs and babies, you know? Like _hunnieee_ ,” he does his best drunk-Zitao impersonation. “And the other one, he likes to pretend he’s very manly and then he cries like a baby every time his girlfriend doesn’t pick the phone after they fight.”

Kyungsoo smiles – it’s his big smile, that makes him look squishy.

“I like that girl that works in your shop,” he says, still smiling.

“Ah, she likes you too. She calls you Cinderella since you forgot your shoe. But she says I’m not a prince, but a dragon.”

Kyungsoo snorts.

 

.

 

Yifan opens the door, whistling. His phone is ringing, but it’s Luhan warning him, sending Yifan a hundred messages like _pick me at the airport, don’t forget!!!!_

“Look who’s in a good mood,” Amber says, smiling, turning his chair like a James Bond Villain. “It’s the first time I see you happy to work at Saturday. I wonder what happened last night…”

“It’s the first time I see you working on Saturday,” he grins, raising an eyebrow. “Why don’t you tell me what happened last night first?”

“I found out how much cost to pay a Wedding Photograph,” she nods slowly. “So, I’m here for the extra pay.”

“I’m sure you are.”

“How about you, cookie monster? No cakes today?” She wriggles her eyebrows. “Or did you get the cake last night?”

“No, I just went to the play with him. A comedy play, by the way,” Yifan says, sitting in the couch. “No Shakespeare bullshit. Where’s the guy?”

“He’s stuck in traffic, he comes from another city, there’s the reason his appointment is today,” she explains calmly. “So, you guys flirted the entire week and nothing happened?”

“We made out in the car,” Yifan smiles, because he can’t contain his feelings. It was incredible to have Kyungsoo straddling him in the front seat. Yifan held on him for his life and their kissing was just… breathtaking – metaphorical and objectively speaking. It was hard to let him go, but Kyungsoo would travel with his friends in the morning. Yifan checks his clock; Kyungsoo must be on the road right now.

Amber makes an impressed sound, slapping her chest.

“Did you get to the second base?”

“Where’s the second base?” Yifan frowns. “I always hear you Americans saying these things, but I’m never sure.”

“To be honest, I’m not sure. Did you grab anything?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“An important one.”

“Shut up.”

“Don’t screw it up,” she raises a finger. “You’ll have to take him to my marriage.”

Yifan stares at her blankly.

“Don’t you think it’s too early? Your marriage is within a month.”

Amber shakes her hair, clearly judging him.

“Ah, and I really thought you were changed,” she says. Yifan haven’t told her about his embarrassing proposal to Kyungsoo, of course. If she knew what he said on the restaurant she wouldn’t let him live.

The guy comes in almost knocking down the door.

“I’m sorry,” he screams. He’s a young man in a bright red and yellow sweater, his hair wet and glued to his face. “I was working all night and it’s—”

“That’s fine,” Yifan says, standing up. “Come in.”

Yifan takes his time to get the guy ready. He sterilizes everything, lets the guy rest in the chair, shaves his chest even if there aren’t much hair.

“So, this is you tattoo,” Yifan shows him the drawing. “I’ll put on your chest so you can see if it’s the right dimensions.”

The guy looks at himself in the tiny mirror, paper glued to his chest.

“Ah… that’s sick, man. I love how you made the drawing with names like I can see it’s the names, but it also looks like a flame, like you’re very talented, man,” he says, excited. “Go on, I’m like, very happy, it’s so crazy, it’s my first tattoo! The boys doesn’t even know I’m here, when they see their names I swear they’ll—”

“It’s not a band?” Yifan is genuinely surprised. “Are you tattooing the name of your friends?”

“No, the name of my boyfriends,” he says proudly.

“There’s… six names on it.”

“Yes,” the guy smiles.

“What’s your name again?” Yifan asks cautiously.

“Hoseok.”

“So, Hoseok, you’re dating six guys?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re going to tattoo their names on your chest.”

“Yes.”

Yifan lets out a long sigh.

“Before I grab my tattoo gun,” he says very slowly, trying to look comprehensive. “Are you sure you want to do this? I’m just asking because one of my big fears is to see my tattoos in some _Tattoo Nightmares_ kind of show, you see?”

“I’m sure I want to do it,” Hoseok smiles.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit… crazy or something? I don’t recommend partner’s name tattoos. Relationships end.”

“Not ours. We are in our five-year anniversary now,” Hoseok blinks. “I can tell you the whole story while you tattoo me.”

Yifan is curious, so he listens to it and asks few things while he’s working. He finishes in three hours. Amber watches Hoseok leaves and stares at Yifan in silence.

“What,” he asks, pulling down the mask.

“Were you chatting with this human version of an energetic chihuahua?”

“Guy dates six dudes. It’s a cute story after all,” he explains while discarding the used material. “I was entertained by it.”

“He was talking nonstop. Even I got annoyed. Are you sure you haven’t fucked last night?”

“No,” he spits. “I told you Kyungsoo likes things slow. I won’t rush him.”

“Okay, okay. Bambi called you, by the way.”

“Fuck,” Yifan runs to her. Ten missed calls. “His flight must have arrived early. I have to go. Can you close the shop for me?”

“Yeah,” Amber nods. “Go have fun.”

 

.

 

If there is something that Yifan isn’t having, it’s fun.

Luhan is rolling on the ground, laughing like he’s about to die from asphyxiation. Zitao is showing his loud, theatrical laugh, while pouring champagne in his glass. Yifan is sitting in the couch, trying to remember why he told his friends about what happened.

“ _Oh, Zitao, man up, you’re acting like a little girl who’s seeing her favorite boyband member_ ,” Tao imitated him before takes a sip of his drink. “And now, it’s like, _omg! I’ll have to take my clothes in front of Kyungsoo! I’m so scared!_ ”

“Listen, I understand you guys making fun of my mistake… because… well, I was a bit dramatic about that mansion thing,” Yifan says, nodding. Luhan stops laughing for a minute, inhales, exhales and then laughs again. “But don’t make fun of my nervousness, okay? I told you I like him and I don’t want to do anything wrong.”

“Oh, do you think I forgot when you mocked my anxiousness when I was thinking about to move in with Sehun?” Zitao walks to him, narrowing his eyes. “Because I don’t. You spend a week telling me I was exaggerating.”

“It wasn’t like because you wanted to take Vivi and Candy to a dog’s therapy?” Yifan raises an eyebrow.

“They would have to live together! You know dogs have territorialism! They could have a problem in their convivence.”

Luhan sits up and wipes his eyes.

“This is one of the best days of my life.”

“I won’t pick you up next time.”

“Ah, you left me waiting there for an hour,” Luhan crosses his arms and legs. “And when I’m going to meet this amazing man? Tao already met him? So, you like Zitao more now?”

“Luhan, can you stop being competitive for a minute. This is no game,” Yifan breathes in. “Zitao didn’t met him officially. We weren’t dating back then.”

“Let’s meet him now, then,” Luhan raises his eyebrows, in a futile attempt to look threatening. “I will be here for a while.”

“First, he went to his friend’s birthday and it’s in another city. Second,” Yifan gulps. “It’s too early for that.”

“Didn’t you meet his friends?!” Luhan sounds offended now. “Why can’t us meet him?”

“It was different—” Yifan starts to explain, but he stops when Zitao sits (falls) on the couch next to him. He shows his phone screen to Yifan. “What?”

“I think he’s in the same party than Sehun,” Zitao’s long finger point to a picture of a group of friends. “It’s him right here, isn’t it?”

Yifan looks closer. He can see easily Kyungsoo’s friends on the picture, both in party looks, holding beer cans, next to a pool. But Kyungsoo isn’t next to then – ironically, Sehun is actually holding Jongin, - but hugging a skinny guy with bleached hair.

“What’s happening there?” He asks, narrowing his eyes. Luhan jumps up, standing and almost falling on them.

“Where is he? Where is he?” Luhan asks. Zitao points to him. Kyungsoo is looking good, styled his hair up, and he’s in a band shirt under a shiny and thin coat. The guy, dressed like he’s at some awards show, is holding him by the waist, leaning into Kyungsoo’s personal space.

“Who’s this blonde guy?” Yifan asks.

“Ah, this one? Is the birthday boy, Baekhyun,” Zitao laughs. “He’s a mess. I was shocked he was friends with your crush. I mean, this one is Jongin, he was Sehun’s classmate in high school. And this one is Chanyeol. He’s… I don’t know. He’s loud.”

“So, it’s the tiny one?” Luhan makes his classic surprised-deer-face. “He’s so cute!”

“I recognized him by the lips and the eyebrows. He has a very unique face,” Zitao says, but Yifan isn’t paying attention. “Do you want me to ask Sehun to talk to them?”

“No. It’s better if I pretend I’m not staking on him.”

“You’re not,” Zitao snorts. “I mean, not anymore.”

“Even Sehun met him before I did,” Luhan shakes his head, disappointed. “I should break our friendship bracelet.”

“Yeah, do me this favor,” Yifan sighs. “I want to drink too.”

Zitao offers him his champagne glass and Yifan drinks it all in one sip.

“Damn,” Luhan seems impressed. “I guess our night have finally started.”

 

.

 

Even the sound of the door closing in his ears hurts in his ear.

“Damn,” Amber says, making a face. “What happened, man?”

Yifan sees himself in the mirror behind her desk. He must have startles someone in the streets looking like that, in his biggest black jumper and his sunglasses. But he would definitely scare a person if they see how he would look without things covering his face.

“Hangover,” he mumbles, sitting down. “Where’s the client?”

“Bathroom,” Amber points with her chin. “Get your shit together before she comes back.”

“I’ll try,” he says, and for a moment, he wished he smoked – only an even worst taste would camouflage the remaining alcohol in his mouth. “Am I too late?”

“No. But I’m disappointed,” she says, mocking. “I thought Kyungsoo put you in the line. Now, you’re back to your party lifestyle?”

“Sehun is out of the town, Luhan is back, you know how the boys get,” he sighs. “I barely left Tao’s house. It was just hanging out.”

“And why did you drink so much?” Amber narrows her eyes again, suspicious. “Did something happen?”

He hears the noise before he realizes it was just the bathroom door. He can even hear the high heels making _tic tic tic_ on the floor. He stands up with difficulty.

A tall girl is on the room, standing. She’s skinny and has long black straight hair – she’s somewhat familiar. Yifan guides her inside and he takes a long time to find her drawing.

“Oh, what’s your name, again?” He asks, checking the paper.

“It’s Sooyoung,” she says, nodding. “But in my email, it’s Joy. That’s how most people call me.”

“Ah, Joy. That’s it,” he sighs. Having the drawing, he gets it read to be applied in her skin. “Can I close the curtains?”

“Yes…?” She seems to be confused. Only now he notices how pretty she is. She’s using some band merch crop top and jeans and still look flawless. Yifan feels like shit.

“I’m sorry. The lights… my eyes are a bit sensitive today,” he explains. “It’s just one. I have to see what I’m doing anyway.”

She stays perfectly still while he’s applying and barely complains when he tattoos the first lines in her skin.

“I really like your drawing,” she says quietly. “I look for many tattooists, but you were the only one who made the lyrics look good.”

“Thank you,” he mumbles, but the sound is muffled on the mask.

“… I’m still shocked. The only Wu I met was a girl? She was a tattooist too, I guess I thought you were a girl because of that,” she laughs. “Honestly. How your drawings can be so delicate? I’m confused.”

He pushes the mask down while he’s changing the color. His head is still hurting and he’s not controlling what he speaks anymore.

“I do it with love. Drawing and painting are my passion,” he says, distracted. “I guess I treat them like a lover. They’re my soft spot.”

“That’s cute,” she chuckles lightly.

The tattoo doesn’t take too long as he expects. In less than two hours he finishes it, and even with the swollen aspects, the coloring looks beautiful in her arm. She leaves the room to pay with Amber and he discards the used material.

Amber is grinning when he goes to her desk.

“What?” He asks, annoyed. “I’m not in the mood for mocking.”

She shows him a tiny piece of paper. He takes it.

“Hot girl left for you before leaving.”

There’s just a phone number and a name.

“For what?” He frowns.

“You must be really drunk,” Amber laughs. “A girl like that could end my marriage and I’m not even married yet.”

Oh.

Ooooooh.

He keeps the paper in his jeans pocket and ignores his friend’s teasing for the rest of the day. Kyungsoo sends him a message warning he’s back in town just before he closes the shop.

“Are you sure you can do it on your own?” Amber asks, putting on her leather jacket. “You should just go home, I can do that.”

“Relax, go get your girl,” he assures her. “The hangover is over. You know alcohol can’t affect me for a long time.”

“Yeah, but you seem mad,” she seems worried. “What happened?”

Yifan sighs and let his body relax a bit.

“I…”

Amber shakes her head and points to the couch. He sits, reluctantly, but sits down.

“I think I really like him,” he finally says. “As… in… really like a… romcoms and dramas?”

“I’m aware of the concept of love,” she says dryly. “I’m going to get married.”

“I saw this picture of him with close friends.”

Amber walks back just a little, as if she’s shocked. She sits on the couch, next to him.

“And how that made you feel?”

“Weird.”

“Ok. I need a more elaborated answer.”

“I felt like I wasn’t a part of his life. I know we… don’t know each other for too long, but seeing him being so intimate with people I don’t know made me feel like I’m a… secret.”

“Hummm…” Amber leans her head, pouting like she’s inspecting something. “So, you’re jealous.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s not a bad thing,” she says softly. “Sometimes we’re jealous because we are afraid of losing someone we love. What you do with your jealousy is another thing. You know you don’t have the right to demand anything, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I think you should just use this. Introduce him to your friends,” she laughs at him pained expression. “I know they’re a mess and they embarrass you, but they love you. Also, ask him to come to my marriage. I will fight with Luna for another invitation, but it’s the right thing to do. Just… let this intense Scorpio shell break and stop being this suspicious of everything. Y’all water signs can’t do shit but hide.”

“I don’t get—”

“You don’t have to understand. Just… stop being so deep and go with the flow.”

“That’s not a good advice.”

“Oh, yeah. It’s the best one. I made a water pun. I can go all night long if you don’t ask him.”

 

.

 

 

Yifan takes five minutes to get to the right building, but once he’s there, he’s damn sure – he can hear dozens of screams and there’s drunk people in every floor. It’s a nice place, but no elevator and Kyungsoo lives on the third floor. As he walks between the loud young people, Yifan remembers that he’s actually three years older than Kyungsoo and if this makes no difference in their relationship, it sure does when the subject is their social groups. Most of people there look like they just escaped from a college fraternity party.

“Hey, Yifan,” someone screams. Yifan turns to see and of course it’s Chanyeol.

“Hey,” he answers, waving.

“Do you want a beer?” He shows him the bottle, but Yifan shakes his head.

“I’m driving,” he explains. “Also, I’m hungover.”

“So was I,” Chanyeol snorts. He’s in a baseball black-and-white jersey and he looks younger. “But the secret to avoid hangovers is to stay drunk.”

“Smart…” Yifan says, looking around.

“Ah, are you looking for Kyungsoo?” Chanyeol points to a corridor. “His room is the last one. He’s hungover too, so he’s tired.”

Yifan feels like he’s in a concert, having to push people out of his way. The last door has at least ten signs warning to not come in and to not knock, so it must be Kyungsoo’s room. Instead of knocking, Yifan sends him a sms asking him to open the door.

Kyungsoo lets him in. His hair is wet and he’s not using glasses, dressed in an old black shirt and shorts. Yifan tries not to stare.

“Sorry,” he says, closing the door. “It’s not like that every day. You can sit on the bed.”

Kyungsoo’s room is neat. There’s just one table, one bed and a closet. Kyungsoo’s notebook and books stay on the table and the closet is big and classic. Yifan sits down.

“Is it the birthday again?”

“Huh?” He asks, picking his glasses on the bed. “No, no. Jongin’s final essay was approved. He’s going to graduate soon.”

“Oh, I didn’t see him. You should have warned me. I would bring something,” Yifan says quietly. There was so many booze at Tao’s that he could really give something to them.

“Don’t worry, he’s pretty wasted. His friends are… casual alcoholics,” Kyungsoo chuckles, sitting next to Yifan. “How was the weekend? Sorry I couldn’t talk more on the phone.”

“No problem. I just worked and drank with my friends,” Yifan looks down at him and glances at his legs. “How was the party?”

“Loud,” Kyungsoo smiles. “Baekhyun likes to make huge parties. I… I didn’t know Sehun knew you. He dates your friend…”

“Yeah, they take a billion pictures to put on the internet,” Yifan laughs. “Haven’t you recognized him?”

“No… I don’t like social media,” he says, but Yifan already knew. Every time Kyungsoo opens his mouth, they find something in common. It’s just… magic. “But he told me. I don’t see him often, but he’s a good friend.”

“Ah… yes,” Yifan says and he’s anxious. He watches the way Kyungsoo licks his lips and he has to take a long breath. “And… what do you want to do tonight? Do you want to go out?”

“I’m… having a headache,” he says, taking his glasses off. Yifan watches it, hypnotized. “I thought we should stay here, if the noise doesn’t bother you.”

“It doesn’t,” he mumbles. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

Kyungsoo looks up and Yifan knows it’s his determined look. He slides his soft hand up Yifan’s shirt and the room seems to be a thousand degrees.

“I… kind of want to… get a bit of revenge today,” he says quietly. “Every time there’s a party people have sex here and I have to clean in the morning. Maybe this time… it could be the opposite…”

Oh.

Oh, _fuck_.

Yifan is trying to make his brain work because this is true and this is really happening, they’re alone in Kyungsoo’s room, Kyungsoo is looking at him _like that_ and they’re about to—

He doesn’t have to think about an answer because Kyungsoo kisses him.

It’s such an intense kiss and Yifan can only think about the fact he went there with the purest of the intentions, he only wanted to see Kyungsoo and maybe talk about Amber’s marriage while Kyungsoo was plotting this whole thing.

Kyungsoo breaks the kiss and pushes YIfan’s shirt; for a moment Yifan just allows him to do it, but then he regain his senses,

“I didn’t… I wasn’t ready for it, so maybe I don’t—”

“I have condoms, lube, dildos, scented oil and towels, don’t worry,” Kyungsoo says, and he’s trying to open Yifan’s jeans. His tiny shorts are too short to hide the fact he’s not using underwear. He pushes Yifan down until they’re both lying on the bed.

Yifan is speechless.

“Did you plan all this?” He mumbles, confused.

“Yes,” Kyungsoo says resolutely.

“Holy shit,” Yifan mumbles, shocked. “I… I…”

Kyungsoo supports himself on his hands, putting a distance between their bodies.

“You don’t want to…?”

“No, no! I do, I do,” he says quickly, nodding. “Just… you got me by surprise, that’s all.”

Kyungsoo smiles.

“Good. Because I want it to be noisy. I want them to listen to us. Understood?”

Yifan just laughs. He really found the love of his life, didn’t he?

“Understood.”

 

.

 

 

Yifan wakes up feeling relaxed and warm.

He opens his eyes and realizes that Kyungsoo is sleeping next to him. Yifan admires him for a while, and then slowly leaves the bed. He walks carefully in the room, putting on a shirt and his underwear. His jeans and his shoes are still on the floor, just like Kyungsoo’s clothes.

He finds his phone and he checks it. He has to go to work in few minutes. What’s he’s supposed to do now?

He has to wash his face and pee, so he opens the door and looks for the bathroom. Everyone else is sleeping, people on the couch, on the ground, but thank god, not in the bathroom.

He washes his face and his mouth, eliminate a lot of water off his body and tiptoes back to Kyungsoo’s room. That was no need to be quiet, because Kyungsoo is awake, sitting in the bed and rubbing his eyes. He looks so cute while he sleeps – even because now Yifan know he has the softest belly in the world.

“Good morning,” Kyungsoo says, looking at him. “Where were you?”

“Bathroom,” Yifan panics. “I wasn’t leaving. I just needed to pee.”

“I know. I didn’t expect you to leave without pants and shoes,” Kyungsoo smiles. His voice is rough and he has a very exposed hickey in his neck. “Are you late to work?”

“Not yet,” he says, because technically it’s true. “How about you? Are your friend still substituting you?”

“Yeah,” he nods slowly. “But I’ll take Seulgi’s turn later. Do you want breakfast?”

“No, I don’t want you to cook,” Yifan walks to him. Instead of sitting in the bed, he kneels in front of Kyungsoo. “I… want a kiss, instead.”

Kyungsoo smiles lazily; he throws his arm over Yifan’s shoulders while they’re kissing, so Yifan holds him closely too.

“You know,” Kyungsoo breaks the kiss briefly. “Your shop has the office hours written on the door, right?”

“Huh… yes?” Yifan mumbles, still confused after kissing.

“I know you have to leave,” Kyungsoo chuckles. “Don’t worry. I’ll have to help the boys today. You don’t have to stay.”

“Ah, fine,” Yifan nods, but kiss him one last time before his knees start to hurt. He’s really getting old. “It was really nice. I’m tired.”

“You’re welcome,” Kyungsoo says, pushing him lightly. Yifan stands up, puts his pants and shoes on in a minute and leaves, trying to avoid to step in the drunk people in the way out. He drives carefully and takes twenty minutes to park. To his luck, only Amber sits in the reception.

“Where’s…?” He asks confused.

“First one cancelled, next one is in two hours and it’s a cover-up,” she smirks. “You should rest instead, you look like you didn’t have any sleep last night.”

“You’re damn right,” Yifan whispers. “I’m going to take a nap on the chair.”

“Oi,” she stands up, angry. “You can’t leave like that! Tell me what happened.”

Yifan is almost inside when he decides to walk back just for a little addition.

“Just so you don’t say I don’t say anything—”

“You don’t say anything!”

“—I definitely went through all the bases last night.”

Amber almost jumps the desk to ask more, but he closes the door. He takes a good nap and he wakes up when she knocks on the door. The cover-up tattoo takes almost seven hours, which wasn’t a surprise at all. He’s exhausted as he finishes, so he just goes home after closing the shop.

In the next day, he’s a new man. He sends Kyungsoo messages asking about his schedule for the day and he actually stops by the bakery to buy breads, but he doesn’t see Kyungsoo. Yifan doesn’t want to bother him at work, so he just draws the tattoos that the clients asked and paints few unfinished works.

Kyungsoo answers him hours later and he informs he’s too busy for the rest of the week.

Yifan doesn’t think it’s weird, because Kyungsoo spent few days away from work, so he must be working harder to compensate; yet, he offers to treat him a dinner.

Kyungsoo answers to that the other day, while Yifan is tattooing. Yifan only reads the message hours later, but it doesn’t matter, because Kyungsoo says he’s too busy for that.

“You do know we have rehearsals tomorrow, right?” Amber draws his attention, bringing the box with the new paints. “No appointments. We’ll be on the place.”

“Yeah, I know, I know,” he says, annoyed. He can’t wait for Amber to get married already. “I’ll close the shop for the day.”

“Don’t complain, you asshole,” she threatens to throw the box on him. “You’re in my selected list of bestmen!”

“I know.”

“Why are you like that?”

Yifan shrugs.

“It’s Kyungsoo, isn’t?” She smiles. “What happened?”

“Nothing. He’s just too busy for me.”

“Uhhh, poor baby,” she mocks him. “Have you asked him to come with you?”

Yifan rubs his eyes, “no, no. Sorry. I forgot.”

“Of course, you forgot,” Amber sighs, shaking her head.

Yifan spends the following days trying to contact Kyungsoo in any way; he calls, sends texts, stops by the bakery and keeps looking around for him. It’s not very effective. He has to stay for every rehearsal seeing Tao and Luhan talk incessantly about their partners and he doesn’t feel okay to share.

After a week, Yifan is almost believing that Kyungsoo is avoiding him. And once his Scorpio mind suspects something, he’s done. He borrows Tao’s car and he parks next to the bakery. He stays there for long two hours, just drinking coffee and waiting. Kyungsoo comes out late, alone, just holding his bag. Yifan seizes the opportunity and calls him.

Yifan gets the confirmation when Kyungsoo picks his phone, stares at it and then ignores the call.

“What the…” he narrows his eyes, trying to keep cool. Kyungsoo walks peacefully and Yifan waits again for him to leave. Then, Yifan drives to Kyungsoo’s house and waits for him to arrive.

Yifan is in front of his building, arms crossed, when Kyungsoo comes home.

“Hello,” Yifan says, staring deadly at him. “Surprise.”

Kyungsoo looks really surprised for a moment; soon, he puts on his blank face.

“Hello. What are you doing here?”

Yifan tells himself he has to keep it cool.

“Why didn’t you answer my calls?”

“I was busy…” Kyungsoo says, holding onto his bag’s strap. He’s avoiding Yifan’s eyes.

“Too busy to answer your phone? All of these days?” Yifan frowns and he’s just a second away to expose his own stalker behavior.

“Yes,” Kyungsoo answers quietly. “I was—”

“Okay, shut up,” he’s not good at playing games. “Why are you avoiding me?”

Kyungsoo breathes out; they both don’t enjoy pretending.

“Because you’re exactly what I was afraid of,” Kyungsoo says dryly.

“What?” Yifan almost snorts; he’s offended. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“You know what I’m talking about,” Kyungsoo spits, pushing Yifan out of his way. “Go home.”

“Go home?” Yifan turns to see Kyungsoo walking in; he’s climbing the stairs, so Yifan chases him. “What…? So are you dumping me or what?”

Kyungsoo freezes and turns to him slowly. “Dumping you? Are you really going to pretend we were seriously dating?”

“Yes?” Yifan gestures wildly. “What else it would be?”

“I don’t know,” Kyungsoo says harshly, and it’s such a weird feeling to look in him in the eyes like that, in the same height because of the stairs. “I have no idea of how you would call dating a person while still pretending you’re single.”

“I was pretending I was single?”

“Are you going to act like that?” Kyungsoo says impatiently. “You came here to fuck me with a girl’s phone number in your fucking pocket. I can’t imagine how you would think this is remotely okay.”

“I did what?” Yifan is really confused; he takes a long breath and tries to remember what Kyungsoo is talking about. “I don’t understand.”

“Yeah, you don’t,” Kyungsoo mumbles, angry. “If you’re going to pretend that I’m lying or that I’m crazy, you better go.”

“I’m not,” Yifan says seriously, looking back at him. “I just don’t remember what you’re talking about.”

Kyungsoo seems to be taken aback with the sincerity on his tone.

“A small piece of paper fell down your pocket when you we’re dressing,” he says pointedly. “I thought it was trash. I was going to throw it away, then I read it and it was a girl’s phone number, Joy.”

Yifan gapes at him.

“… That was a client,” he says, shocked. “Are you really ignoring me because you found out a paper and just jumped to conclusions based on that only, with no absolute context?”

“Do I need more context than a phone number in a pocket?” Kyungsoo frowns, angry. “Do you think I was born yesterday?”

“No, I don’t,” Yifan spits back. Now he’s angry too. “I think you don’t trust me at all. You didn’t even listen to me. You could have asked me about it.”

“Yeah, of course,” Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and Yifan is deeply offended. “I don’t have time for this bullshit. You got what you wanted, now leave.”

“Then I will,” he says, serious. “I guess this would be happen anyway. You’re not talking to me, but some other guy you think I am. I’m not playing games. I like you. But you do keep judging me based on… anything but what I am.”

“I’m not judging you, I’m protecting myself,” Kyungsoo lets his arm fall, and his eyes are shining in a bad way. “You think I haven’t deal with a lot of guys who do exactly what you do? Listen, I don’t care if you want to fuck around, but not with me.”

“I am not,” Yifan says slowly, “fucking around.”

“I don’t believe in words,” Kyungsoo says simply, turning to leave. Yifan watches him disappear and stays in the same place for a while. Then, he takes a last look at the stairs and leaves.

He’s better alone, anyway.

 

.

 

Being alone isn’t the best decision. He drinks more than he should and his drawings are as horrible as they were when he was five. He has a headache, kicks his chair twice, sleeps while Amber is talking and gives up fighting Tao and goes out with him and Luhan.

Yifan is a mess.

“Stop taking selfies,” he pushes Luhan away from him. “And stop using your phone. We’re at the movies.”

“The movie haven’t started yet,” Luhan keeps his phone in his pocket. He’s using a thick coat like he never knew cold in his life. The AC isn’t that strong. “And since I’ll never meet your ex, at least I can have this Adele moment of yours recorded forever.”

“You used to be a good person,” Yifan stares at him, offended.

“Why you don’t keep marriage tradition and hook up with one of the bridesmaids? Soojung is cute,” Zitao munches his second bag of popcorn and the movie even started. Luhan nods eagerly.

“I can’t believe I’m hearing this from you,” Yifan turns to Tao, confused. “I thought you would be your usual love enthusiast. Now you suggest me to hook up two days after I broke up?”

“Well, if it was Luhan, I would never say that,” Tao lifts his eyebrows to give emphasis. “But you know Kyungsoo is right, so, move on.”

“What?” Yifan says a bit too loud to a movie theater. Luhan snorts.

“Well, it’s true? You do act like you’re the hottest guy in the world, walking around with girls and tattoos… and some douchebags…” Zitao eats the popcorn, staring at the dark screen. “I mean, that Justin guy is a fuckboy, and to say something bad about Canadians…”

“First, Kyungsoo doesn’t know my friends. Second, you two could be also read as fuckboys.”

“I’m a family man and Tao is just a diva,” Luhan points. “You know what we’re talking about. You think it’s funny that we look feminine, because you think that’s ridiculous.”

“You think that too—”

“No, I don’t! I’m just tired of hearing over and over again. People wouldn’t talk so often about it if they didn’t think it’s wrong.”

“Why you don’t listen to yourself?” Tao asks, turning to him. “You said yourself that Kyungsoo doesn’t know us. I mean, look what I had to do just to see him. If you’re dating someone, then it’s public, isn’t it?”

“But—”

“But nothing. He’s right,” Tao raises a finger. “If Sehun came home with someone’s number in his pocket I would throw a fit. You should have apologized and not just have accused him of being insecure. You don’t know how it’s hard for gay guys to have straight men fetichizing them and then just walking away or pretending nothing happened.”

Yifan gapes at him.

“It is weird that you kept that number. It’s not something that a person who’s taken should do,” Luhan agrees. “I know you didn’t mean anything, but it’s just show how picking up girls was an old habit.”

“Amazing,” Yifan shakes his head. “Now, I’m guilty? He always thought I wasn’t someone to trust solely based on my appearance. Isn’t that prejudicial?”

“Oh, look at him, Luhan, he’s being oppressed for his displays of masculinity… People who look too heterosexual suffer so badly…” Zitao makes a dramatic gesture, leaning the back of his hand against his forehead. “Shut your dumb-dumb mouth! You know exactly why you behave like this.”

Yifan wants to complain, but the movie starts to play. He’s annoyed, but he watches it through. He gives up of fighting about it, because he knows it’s a lost cause. Both of them already decided he’s wrong, he’s not up for useless discussion.

 

 

His curse seems to be gone. He no longer sees couple thing and his only daily dose of romance is the two-hour rehearsals to Amber’s wedding. He watches dramas, eats on restaurant and drinks, but always alone or with one of his friends. He doesn’t even try to hit on the bridesmaids – Soojung is clearly gay, Jinri isn’t his type and Qian is really nice, but he would rather be her friend.

He never thought about smoking as a good thing, not even remotely, but now, once in a while, he catches himself staring at smokers in the streets.

But he’s fine.

One day, he comes too early to open the shop and sees Kyungsoo walking in the bakery, chatting with Joohyun. He’s using his glasses and soft clothes and Yifan’s heart beats so fast that he needs to stop walking for a while.

He’s super great.

He has to hold a bucket with him in the day before Amber’s wedding, because she’s so nervous that she keeps telling him she’s about to throw up.

“Listen, you bachelor’s party starts in a few hours,” he says harshly, but he’s worried as hell. “Get your shit together!”

“I’m trying,” she cried, holding onto the bucket. “Oh, my god, I’m so nauseous, it’s that how pregnant people feel?

“Are you asking me?” Yifan scratches his neck. “Who’s the next today?”

“A random guy named Jin. He says he’ll be here in few minutes to talk about a drawing.”

“Ah, at least I don’t have to tattoo,” he looks down at her. “I would have to cancel it to take care of you.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Amber says while her hair is glues in her forehead; how she can sweat under the AC, only god knows.

The guy, Jin, gets late but arrives while Amber is still sitting on the ground, holding the bucket. He helps Yifan by calming her and he’s just a sweetheart. Only when then they convince her to take a nap, they can talk about the tattoo.

“So, can you tell me how exactly you want it?” Yifan asks, sitting by his tiny table. “I can do a quick sketch and then you say if you like it.”

“I do want to write some lyrics, but I’m afraid it’s quite long,” he says softly. “I wanted it to look nice, not just like a was… like a book in my skin.”

“Okay,” Yifan grab his pen. “Say it and I’ll see what I can do.”

“ _Don’t worry, love. Because all of this is not coincidence. We’re completely different, baby. Because we’ve found our destiny_ ,” he says it slowly, allowing Yifan to write it down. “I wished it was in a very clean calligraphy, you see?”

“Nice. Can I break the verse structure?”

“Yes, if it’s understandable,” he nods. “I’ve heard a lot about how nice you draw. My boyfriend made a tattoo here. I mean, one of them.”

Yifan lifts his gaze.

“One of them?” How many polyamorous people will come there?

“Oh, yeah. I date six men,” he nods innocently, like he just announced he likes chocolate. “Hoseok tattooed with you.”

“Oh, yes,” Yifan nods too. “I remember him.”

“He was mesmerized by your talent.”

“Thank you,” Yifan smiles. “But I need to say the same thing I’ve told him. Are you sure you want to do a relationship-related tattoo?”

“Oh, yes,” he smiles cutely.

“Then, you’ve been warned.”

“It’s important for us, you see. To have it on our skins.”

“But in the skin… it’s a bit hard to forget. I can do a cover-up in the future, but it costs a lot.”

“I wouldn’t cover it,” Jin says seriously. “Not even if we broke up. They are a part of my history, no matter what. Try to hide that is like doing plastic surgery to cover crinkles. It doesn’t suit me. Or us as a whole relationship, to be honest.”

 Yifan nods and goes back to drawing. It takes a while and Jin patiently waits by watching Yifan’s drawing and paintings.

“You’re single, right?” He asks suddenly. Yifan mumbles a ‘yes’ while drawing. “I can see it. So many drawings and paintings, none of them is a person.”

“I’m not lucky with relationships.”

“Really? That’s weird,” Jin says, still staring at the drawings. “Not just because you’re a good-looking guy. But you’re definitely a skilled artist, it’s kind of hard to imagine creating art without having muses.”

“I don’t agree,” he snorts, now cleaning the lines.

“That’s fine,” Jin says softly. He’s a really soft-voiced guy. “But I guess I understand why you draw so nicely what other people asks you to. Maybe it’s easier to picture and to translate other people love when you don’t have one of your own to distract you.”

Yifan stops drawing to look at him.

“Are you a psychologist or what?”

“Ah, none of that,” he laughs. “I’m just good at reading people. My boyfriends call me ‘mom’, because I’m always right. Well, I’m also the oldest one.”

Yifan just gapes at him.

 

.

 

Amber’s bachelor party is the most boring party he has even been. Tao is crying, Sehun is taking pictures for his Instagram, Luhan is on the phone, Amber is too anxious to have fun, Jackson and Minho, the other bestmen, are both taken and they seem to never have been into a club before. Yifan is so bored that he picks his notebook to draw in the clean side of the table.

It’s so obvious.

His memory of Kyungsoo’s face is so strong he doesn’t need any photo to remind him of details. It’s his smile when he looks up, with his eyes so small and his cheeks so kissable, Yifan’s favorite sight lately. He loses the track of time, drawing every lash perfectly, his thick eyebrows. He barely hears the loud music and the poor lighting doesn’t affect his lines.

He _is_ in love.

He’s going back and forth, accepting and denying later, giving-in and retreating to his shell, but in the end, he fell in love so quietly and so naturally that he had no time to fight against it.

This immense cliché situations with no end, all that sugary and soft things that he often rejected comes from a reason – maybe the person he built to present is no longer who he is.

Yifan is a man. A man in love.

And he doesn’t have to act tough when his insides are melting because a tiny baker smile at him shyly. He has no reason to be ashamed because he has dreams about giving his (ex?) boyfriend a mansion on China and maybe having dogs too. He doesn’t have to go around playing manly for girls in his sport car, because any car that can fit Kyungsoo (or… just any car, it’s the same) is a good car. If being in love means that cute cupcakes and expensive macarons make his heart beat faster, then, he will enjoy them and buy every girly _#instafood_ trend because… it doesn’t matter. He doesn’t care about being a man – he cares being the person Kyungsoo will love back.

And, analyzing the situation as it happened… Kyungsoo met a side of Yifan that most people didn’t… or even Yifan himself didn’t know it was there.

Something drops on the corner of the drawing. He lifts his head and find a slightly intoxicated Sehun.

“Can I take a picture?” He asks. Yifan just nods. “It’s a nice drawing of Kyungsoo. He doesn’t like when people draws him, normally. It’s hard to convince him that he’s pretty as he looks in the drawing.”

“Oh,” Yifan mumbles. Sehun leans his head like a pug, smiling softly.

“Tao said you two were dating… It’s hard for me to picture you two together,” he says thoughtfully. “Also, funny. Because of the height difference. But… still hard to picture.”

“Why?” Yifan asks genuinely. He’s too deep in his realization to get mad.

“Kyungsoo doesn’t like… show offs. No offense,” Sehun says, but it still sounds like an offense. “I mean, you certainly are a more… low-key type of show off, but… He’s more like… a goth.”

“What?”

“You know… like…he hates when he has to do anything that stands out… and… if you ask anything very personal, he runs away from you like… you’re a devil…” Sehun yawns. “You’re like… too much, you see? Not too much in a Chanyeol way… but a too much in a Tao way.”

The worst part is that Yifan actually understood what Sehun was trying to say.

“Yeah, he told me that. But he called me a ten.”

“Ah. Kyungsoo and I have a different taste,” Sehun says calmly. Yifan is this close to call Zitao and ask him to collect his nearly drunk boyfriend.

“Anyways, he’s not interested in me anymore, so I guess it doesn’t matter the number I am,” Yifan practically grunts, trying to draw again. “Take your picture and leave.”

“I hardly would believe that,” Sehun says casually. “Kyungsoo is a really stubborn person. He doesn’t do casual stuff.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” Yifan mutters angrily, still trying to draw.

“You two are very dumb because he’s too insecure to feel like someone like you would be actually interested in him and you are too afraid to step out of your safety zone and fully embrace a deep relationship and compromise? Or you two are too attached at your masculinity to accept everything that may harm it including the feelings that may push you to vulnerability?”

Yifan stops drawing. He slowly lifts his head to stare at Sehun’s peaceful expression.

“What?”

“You said ‘tell me something I don’t know’,” he states clearly, looking at Yifan like the tattooist is the dumbest person in the earth. “Based on what I hear, I was just guessing.”

Yifan gapes at him.

“I heard and saw from both sides,” Sehun shrugs.

 

.

 

Yifan can’t sleep right that night, especially because he has to share the bed with Luhan and he talks in his sleep. Yifan just sighs and lets Luhan talk and move as much as he wants. He’s just very bothered by Sehun’s casual call-out. What Kyungsoo is talking about him?

The marriage day is supposed to be a bit lighter. Luhan catches his girlfriend at the airport, Tao and Sehun have a long day at the spa (many… unnecessary videos) and Yifan helps Amber to not throw up again.

“Now the pants are too large on me,” she takes a look at her suit. “I don’t want to use a belt. It’s an instrument of repression.”

“Shut up,” Yifan breathes out. “The guys already made the thing in your size…”

“Yeah, they’re decent human beings,” she mumbles. They’re all grateful that a store accepted to make her a suit, and they actually acknowledge her as a bride. Most stores laughed at their face; one of the stylists even told her he wouldn’t participate in a “fake wedding”. “I’m glad Luna isn’t going through this…”

Yifan takes a look at her pants again. It doesn’t look that bad. She couldn’t eat right in the last days, but she didn’t lose much weight.

“You look fine. She will look fine,” he assures her. “Then you two will have a nice ceremony and fuck everyone else who tells it isn’t real.”

Amber smiles at him – he sees in the reflex of the mirror.

“Look at you, all romantic and stuff,” she mocks him. “Thanks. But I would be happier if you asked Cinderella to come to my ball.”

Yifan licks his lips slowly. He thought about popping at Kyungsoo’s house or the bakery and just… convince him to go to the wedding. Convince him to… date again. Or just see him. But this is just like those cheesy highschool movies and Yifan is no homecoming king. He wouldn’t find the right words and Kyungsoo is quite scary for a little guy.

“No, he’s not coming,” Yifan sighs. “I’ve tried to contact him…”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just like my astrology rants… I know you get the stuff and pretends you don’t. I know you tried,” she says, fixing her red tie. “Don’t worry, Bud.”

“Hey, Amber,” he says serious. “I love you.”

She turns back to stare at him.

“I love you too,” she snorts. “Seems the marriage fever caught you. You’re oddly sentimental today.”

 

But Yifan is no match to his friends.

No one could have started crying earlier than Zitao, who spends half of the time trying to fix his eyeliner. Everyone looks beautiful. The place is small, and he’s decorated with Sakuras and roses, white carpet and tables. The room is a bit dark, making a nice contrast with the light focus. Yifan is in the best men table and he feels… oddly proud to be there.

They walk in the same size and an instrumental song is playing softly. Luna is stunning in a silver dress and she doesn’t even complain when the lady conducting the ceremony says her real name. Amber snorts, but they’re too emotional to make jokes.

“Now, you may kiss the bride,” the Lady says and laughs too. “Any bride can kiss any bride.”

They kiss shyly and Yifan can’t help but smile.

“Now, you’re married under the eyes of everyone here. The people you love and care,” she says loudly, not staring at the brides, but at the guests. “And that’s the important. This is all that matters.”

Luhan is tearing up and Yifan eyes get teary too, because none of them is made of iron. They pretend that nothing happened by the time of the dance. Every couple jumps to dance near the wives, because it’s playing _Can you celebrate?_ – Yifan watches them for a while, and then realizes that few women sitting are waiting for someone to ask them. He asks one of the bridesmaids, Soojung; they dance for a while. Yifan is still sad.

“Ok, enough,” Amber picks a chair and instead of climb it, she moves it around to get their attention. “I will throw the bouquet!”

“What bouquet?” Jackson asks, confused.

“I bought only just to throw it,” she explains. “Tradition is tradition, bitch. I’m an American. I don’t want to disappoint Beyoncé.”

Yifan laughs, and he excuses himself to sit and to get out of the way. He goes back to his table, and there’s just Luhan there. Zitao and Sehun both stay to pick and some girls complain because they’re too tall.

“All the single ladies,” she says, climbing the chair. Luna brings her a red roses bouquet. “Put your hands up!”

“I bet ten bucks Tao is going to fall,” Luhan whispers to him. 

“I bet ten bucks Amber is going to fall from that chair,” Yifan whispers back.

In ten seconds, both are right.

The problem is: Amber falls from the chair while she’s throwing it, and in an attempt of equilibrate herself, she moves her arms up and the bouquet, instead of falling back, is thrown directly to her side.

In the direction of the best men’s table.

 

Right.

In.

Yifan’s.

Face.

 

Yifan played basketball. He caught flying balls. But in that moment, even seeing the bouquet flying in his direction, even hearing Luhan squealing and moving away from him, he stays in the same place. Frozen.

And the bouquet hits his face.

There is a ‘oooowww’ sound that is so in sync that he knows it’s genuine.

“Yifan,” Amber screams. Yifan is trying to not fall from his chair. “Are you fine?”

“Hey,” Luhan grabs one of his shoulders. Amber gets to them. “Talk to me.”

Yifan opens his eyes, blinking.

“I’m fine,” he says. “My face hurts a little.”

“There’s a cut in your cheek,” Luhan says worriedly. “We need to clean this.”

“Can you see?” Amber says, moving her hand right in front of his face.

“Yes,” he nods, frowning when he feels the cut. “Is it too ugly?”

“Is that you’re worried about?” She laughs. “No! You’re just as hot as ever.”

“And…” Tao approaches them slowly. “The bouquet is in your lap.”

“What?” Yifan looks down.

There it is.

The floral murderer.

“I guess we have the next groom here, folks,” Luhan screams and grabs one of Yifan’s arm triumphantly. “The bouquet made its choice!”

“Yes,” Amber nods. “This is the single gentleman who now will get married! Congratulations!”

Yifan looks around, confused.

“Are you… what?”

Then, in pain, confused and slightly annoyed, he finally understands.

His curse never vanished. Destiny has been sending signals and now it’s _literally_ slapping Yifan’s face. He shouldn’t give up of love.

“God, that was cheese,” he mumbles, setting his arm free from Luhan’s hold. “But I don’t mind.”

“What?” Amber frowns.

“Hey,” he stands up, wipes a drop of blood away from his face and holds the bouquet up. “I’m going to confess to Kyungsoo.”

“The bouquet hit too hard,” Luhan whispers, shocked. “Maybe you want to go to emergency first? Just to check?”

“No,” he says resolutely. “I’m going right now. Sorry, Amber I have to leave early.”

“What?” She stares at him. “Bitch, you’re crazy if you think I’m going to miss this.”

“Huh?” Luhan blinks.

“Everybody,” she screams, turning back to see the guests. “This man is going to confess to his lover now and I’m going to see it! I’ll come back soon. Stay with Luna if you want it, but come with me who wants to watch too!”

“I’ll drive,” Tao screamed, already running. “Sehun, come with me, I don’t know the way!”

“Wait for me,” Luhan runs after him.

Amber taps Yifan’s arms gently.

“Come on! Cinderella is waiting for you!”

“I can’t believe you’re going to leave your wedding party for this,” Yifan says, shocked. “Luna! Are you hearing this?”

“I know who I’m marrying,” she says back, sitting. “I would run away if I could, but in this heels and dress, not today.”

Amber kisses her before promising that she’s returning after recording Yifan’s public humiliation. Yifan would complain at her word choice, but based in how mad Kyungsoo must be… she may be right. They fit in the car, the five of them, but Zitao and Sehun scream the whole time because Sehun is horrible at giving directions – Yifan is too nervous to help them.

“What are you gonna say to him?” Luhan asks, sounding genuinely worried.

“It’s too cliché if I advise him to follow his heart?” Amber asks, mocking.

“After being hit in the face with a bouquet, I guess not…” Yifan shrugs. “I’ll think about that when I see him.”

It’s a bit late for visiting, probably. Yifan sends a text: “I’m in front of your building. Can you come here??? It’s urgent.”

“It seems like a _fuckboy late at night_ text,” Zitao points. “There’s a better way to get them here.”

Sehun solemnly takes his phone of his pocket and type something.

“ There’s… beer… upstairs… also… a… hot… gossip… about… you… know… who…” he says and then clicks on something. “They’ll be here in a minute.”

“Who’s you know who?” Amber asks.

“Whatever they want it to be,” Sehun informs.

Sehun is right.

Chanyeol comes out running, in a fox-printed pajama. After him, walking slowly, comes a yawny Jongin.

“What happened?” he asks Sehun and he’s so curious that he barely notices the rest of them. “Fuck, tell me, man!”

“Aren’t you Kyungsoo’s ex?” Jongin asks frowning and to complete the night, Kyungsoo finally appears, in his tiny shorts and his baggy pajama t-shirt.

“Yes, I guess,” Kyungsoo mumbles. He’s not looking sleepy, but angry. “What are you doing here? And why did you bring Sehun into this?”

“Sehun is out!” Sehun steps back, lifting his hands as a defeated gesture. “Now, it’s your time.”

Chanyeol seems confused, then he crosses his arms.

“Ah, now I get it,” he says angrily. “You’re here after making Kyungsoo sad. So, you better leave.”

“Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo takes a long breath. “Shut up, come here and stay quiet until I order you to speak.”

“But—”

“Chanyeol!”

“Okay, okay,” he complains, and he goes back to his roommates like he’s a sad puppy.

Kyungsoo looks at Yifan, rising one eyebrow.

“Five minutes and I don’t want to hear or listen anything from you after it.”

Yifan gulps. Amber and Luhan push him, and he cautiously walk until he’s a bit closer to Kyungsoo.

“Eh,” he coughs. “I… I wanted to…”

“I don’t have the whole night,” Kyungsoo says dryly.

“Nor do I,” Yifan says quickly. “I just left one of my best friend’s wedding to be here. Because of this.”

He rises the bouquet. Kyungsoo frowns, confused. His roommates also seem lost.

“That thing hit me in the face,” Yifan points to the source of the pain in his cheek. “And I think it was love slapping me in the face so I would wake up and not lose you.”

Yifan can hear Tao’s contained squeal and Jongin touches his own chest, gaping. Kyungsoo’s face is blank.

“Since I met you… Since I… saw you for the first time you make me feel like… things are melting inside of me,” he says, pointing to his chest. “And… I know you’re mad… and before I thought you didn’t had reason to feel like this but now I know… I know I… I made mistakes. But it was because I didn’t want to fully admit that I was falling in love.”

Kyungsoo isn’t showing any sight of being convinced, despite his friends making ‘oooh’ moved noises.

“So, I got the bouquet and when I think about spending the rest of my life with someone, I can only think about you,” Yifan says, staring at Kyungsoo’s eyes, so he’ll know it’s true. “Like I’ve thinking about you this whole time.”

Kyungsoo lets his arm fall. His friends stare at him expectantly. No one is saying a thing.

They’re just waiting. And so is Yifan, because he can’t say anything else. He already bared his heart.

“You could be lying,” Kyungsoo mumbles, and he sounds half defeated. “This is only words.”

Now, the eyes go back to Yifan.

Yifan bends to hold Kyungsoo’s hand. Kyungsoo doesn’t resist. Yifan puts Kyungsoo’s hand against his chest, gently.

“I could be lying,” he looks down at his chest, where he’s holding Kyungsoo’s hand. “But my heart wouldn’t.”

It’s beating a thousand times faster now Yifan’s face is burning because he can’t believe he just did that.

“If he said this shit to me I would suck his dick, I swear. No homo,” Luhan whispers, but in the brutal silence of that accidentally reunion, everybody could hear.

Kyungsoo gulps.

“Say something,” Jongin says anxiously. “Good lord, Kyungsoo.”

“I… I…” Kyungsoo sighs, frustrated. He’s rosy in the cheeks and Yifan is trying to contain himself, because this is… adorable. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I… just want you to say you forgive me,” Yifan says sincerely. It’s dark, it’s late and too cold, but he’s sweating. “So, we can start again.”

Sehun coughs loudly. Kyungsoo looks up to Yifan.

“I do forgive you… if… you forgive me… for treating you like I… like I already knew what your intentions where. I don’t like games or complicated things but… I wasn’t being just straight up to the point. I was being prejudicial too. I see now I… misunderstood your behavior.”

“God, just kiss already,” Amber screams. “I have to go back to my wedding party!”

Yifan looks down at Kyungsoo and waits. Kyungsoo sighs.

“You really wanna humiliate me in front of these people?” He says, standing on his toes to kiss Yifan. The entire neighborhood must have awakened after everyone starts to scream. Yifan laughs, so they can’t actually kiss, but just a peck in the lips is just fine.

“So, everyone is good, now?” Sehun screams. “Let’s go back because I want to eat.”

“Fuck, can we go with you,” Chanyeol asks. “I’m hungry as fuck.”

“Yeah, come, son, today is a celebration!” Amber sings, dancing. They start to get in the car, trying to fit everyone. Yifan doesn’t move. Kyungsoo just hold his hand.

“Will it be a problem if you stay?” He asks gingerly.

“No, it won’t,” Yifan smiles. “But don’t you wanna come to the wedding? Free food and nice drinks. Also, pajamas is the new trend for this occasion.”

Kyungsoo snorts.

“No. I was thinking we should take advantage of having privacy, since they’re gone…”

“We’re staying,” Yifan screams to the people smashed in the car. “See you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, go get it,” someone screams from the car, but Yifan isn’t paying attention anymore.

 

.

 

Kyungsoo isn’t always in the best mood when he wakes up, but when he has a free day, he even gives Yifan few kisses in bed.

“Waking up in your house it’s so weird,” Kyungsoo chuckles, rubbing his swollen face. He looks like a small kid. “It’s… quiet.”

“Yeah,” Yifan nods, moving in bed to touch him. “We could put some music if you want to.”

“Ah, but you’re going to work today…”

“And?”

“And I don’t want you to get late,” Kyungsoo sits up, rubbing his eyes. “Amber is still on her honeymoon. You can’t leave the shop unattended.”

“Okay,” Yifan circles Kyungsoo’s waist with his arms to pull him down gently. “But you’ll be with me, right?”

“What’s the point of having a free day if I’m going to spend it in front of my work?” Kyungsoo lets Yifan move him, chuckling. “I’ll will read a book here.”

“You’ll be here when I get back?”

“Yes,” Kyungsoo nods. “I’ll also cook dinner. I think about doing a—”

“You know I’m gaining weight, right?” Yifan says, pretending to be serious. “You’re creating bad habits for me. Now I’m wasting all my money in expensive macarons. I’m addicted to bread!”

Kyungsoo laughs. Yifan forgets he’s supposed to look like he’s mad.

“I guess this is bad,” Kyungsoo also pretends to be worried. “I mean, you promised me a mansion in China…”

“Shut up.”

“Go to work,” Kyungsoo pushes him playfully. “Otherwise I’ll call your friends and tell them about your macaron addiction. I’ll tell Tao you can only eat the pink muffins!”

“Okay, okay,” Yifan gets up slowly.

 

 

Going to work is not easy, but he has to. He opens the shop, put a soft music on and checks the heart shaped little box next to his drawings. It’s there for a while. He’s waiting for the right moment; in the pastel pink tone, it’s barely visible in the contrast of colors of his room. 

 

Yifan can’t wait to be a married man. 

 

 

 

.


End file.
